Jesus Said “Speak to Her”
Written September 30, 2026
Jesus Said “Speak to Her”
Okay, so if you’ve been reading over the years, you know that going up to someone who is not family and speaking something directly is not my strong point (who am I kidding, saying something directly to even family is sometimes hard for me). Fear starts in my brain with all the doubt and the you-are-not-good-enough and who-do-you-think-you-are that are definitely not from Jesus and I know it.
Anyway…
Sunday at church, a young friend came in. I noticed her and felt a nudge, “tell her.”
The nudge was Jesus, because the thought that went immediately through my brain was “tell her that those who are serving her love to do it – tell her not to listen to the “you don’t deserve it” that is not the truth.” I knew instantly what Jesus meant.
When I was at home, with myself and the girls, no transportation, and I would want to ask for help – often I didn’t because my brain was lying to my heart and telling me that if I reached out for help, I was admitting to failure. That I had asked to be blessed with children and couldn’t handle what God had given me. I always felt inadequate, undeserving of the love that others poured out into my life and that of my children. If I meant that I wanted to be a mother and have children, I should be able to do it all myself and not ask for help. I shouldn’t even accept help. My mother never did (the story I heard all my life growing up and the time then about how my mother did it all herself – she did have my Daddy and when I analyzed later, many people who came alongside her, just not in the foreground). My mind constantly told me I should be able to do it all myself. In truth, that is not so. We can’t do it without Jesus.
I gathered courage, decided that if I wanted to be the person who “walks in Jesus” and actually “speaks the truth” it meant I had to say something when He prodded because sometimes I needed that smile from the Greeter at the door and the comment “your girls are so lovely today” that made me realize someone saw me. Maybe I was needed to say some little word.
I chat a lot when I’m tired or nervous. Louis will sigh and say he’s heard the story before. I’m talking to try to keep myself awake at that point. I hate stuttering, but will stutter or pause when I’m nervous – or add too much that doesn’t make sense. I’m still struggling with adult conversations. At this point, Christina pointed out in passing one day, “ya’ll are old enough to be everyone’s mom!” mentioning how easy it should be for Leslie and I to make comments to our coworkers who were in the gym at that time. Maybe I do just need to perceive those I’m talking to as children – that might make it easier for me to talk and be confident. But, no, once a young person has taken on adult responsibilities, I become nervous talking to them – and most young people I know, that happens in the early teen years.
I almost didn’t say anything. I almost just smiled and left. Maybe God did want me to tell her that the people (and she has an amazing support system!) serving her loved it. They wouldn’t offer if they couldn’t. They see serving her as a joy. They want to be involved in her life and her children’s lives. They feel blessed to be in the capacity they are in. Her allowing them to serve is blessing them.
Because that’s how I feel about my girls.
I love being in the role of someone they want to talk to. I want to help them with whatever they are going through. I am excited about getting to step (someday) into the grandmother role! I’m excited to be able to wash dishes and tidy the house while she rests with her little one. I’m excited to be someone they can call when they want to watch a movie by themselves. I love that my adult girls talk to me and want to spend time with me. Ask me anything; if I can do it, I will. And I will totally enjoy it and feel honored that you trust me in your life. That is really my heart. I’m sure that is the heart of any caring mother, aunt, big sister, grandmother, or member of the family. That’s what “family” means. You always show up to help. You enjoy helping each other. You feel honored to be a part of something bigger than yourself.
So, yes, I swallowed my intense fear and spoke to this young friend. I don’t know if the words came out right but I did pray, “okay God, put the words in my mouth because I don’t know exactly what to say. I want the words to be yours.”
Did I help? Maybe. Did I sound like an old lady just spouting stuff? Maybe. Hopefully, she heard whatever Jesus wanted her heart to hear. I pray for her and am so encouraged by this young woman and her family. I love how she is choosing family. I pray for strength and wisdom for them.
Anyway… so the story of how I spent far more time arguing with my own brain to get to speak for a few moments… Yes, I’m terrified of talking to other people. Kids, sure. Why is that? I have gotten better at remembering people’s names but usually in my mind the process does start with “so-and-so’s mom, her other son is so-and-so, her other daughter so-and-so helps in xyz, her name is finally.”
If God nudges you to encourage someone (yes, reminding myself too!), go encourage them. We are supposed to be encouragers. (We are commanded to encourage others, by the way! – I keep reminding myself of this too.)
Thank you, Jesus, for courage.
Type at you later,
~Nancy Tart
