Tag: strength

Encouragers: The Lady Who Smiles

The Lady Who Smile. Never underestimate the power of your small gesture!

Encouragers: The Lady Who Smiles

October 3, 2022

Some days you just need to be encouraged.  Most often, you don’t realize how important this encouragement is to your mood until someone does encourage you.  As Christians we are admonished to be encouragers.  As iron sharpens iron, we are to help each other: build each other up, edify, support, and speak truth in love. 

There’s a sweet lady who serves as a greeter at our church.  Her smile is absolutely beautiful.  The power of truth in her joy radiates from this smile to warm your heart as soon as you notice her standing at the doorway.  She always says good morning and is far better with names that I am as she often greets people by their first names.  (I try to be good with names, it’s something I’m training myself to do, but I often mix up my own kids or call moms by their daughter’s names and quickly attempt correction by saying, so-and-so’s mom – who am I kidding?)

I was feeling rather low this particular Sunday morning.  A lot has been pressing down on my heart lately – mostly financial, but then, that is a constant mental fight for me.  It goes something like this: Look how poor you are; you can’t even go to xyz (one of the girls’ gymnastics meets, a sister-cousin’s party, a group trip to some amusement park, etc.).  You didn’t send them to Passion Camp this year.  You don’t even own a house.  Such a failure, your dream was stability for your children so they would have a home.  You left a good-paying job… twice.  You chose less and your children pay for it by having to work for the things other kids just get. You have to eat what the food bank gives you.  You pick up underwear from a giveaway group! How selfish can you be to work where you enjoy rather than in a career that would provide better for your children? 

I fight that with: I am so thankful for fellow gym moms allowing my girls to carpool and enjoy their friend-time. They enjoyed sister-time this summer.  God has provided a house for us where my dream of family being close is a reality!  I am chosen by God.  I chose family and integrity, respectively.  My children value the things they have to work for and as they understand the concept of having to work for a gift they give, they appreciate every gift they get more!  God supplies our needs each week.  I’m so thankful for my hand-me-down giving and receiving friends and the Buy-Nothing group!  I have my dream job and am so super thankful for it; A Christian boss who allows me to bring my children when needed, we work schoolwork at the front desk, we’ve relied on work internet for accessing schoolwork courses and even the renting of our home more than a few times, my girls all have had an awesome first job experience, I work for family!

At those times when my mind is a mental battlefield and I force myself to dig deep into thankfulness (I think or speak my “I’m thankful fors”), a little encouragement goes a long way.  Just the fact that the smiling lady at the church doorway remembers my name correctly and can connect me with my girls (who beat us there, again, even though we left first!) gives me such encouragement!  When she says something like “you are such a good mother!” and I can feel the truth in her compliment, it is all I can do to respond with “thank you” and not cry.  I’m so grateful to God for the currently uncountable times the sweet lady has lifted my mood and encouraged me – I end up thanking God for her and that He knows my mental battles.  He knows that small gesture means the world to me. 

I walk in, I worship, I walk out, and usually I feel invisible.  That’s okay to me on the surface because it is so challenging for me to approach someone because I’m so scared of messing up with social interaction with other adults.  It’s the walk to the church gym that makes my head rise – I’m so totally ready to serve children.  Put me in front of children and I’m super confident!  (mom, coach, kid’s ministry assistant, leader, etc.)

I know how much a small bit of encouragement helps me so when God touches my heart to say something to another adult, I have been listening lately.  A compliment, a congratulations, a mention of how well-behaved their child was, encouragement that they are doing a good job as so-and-so has accomplished xyz goal… That is so super hard for me as a human!  I can only encourage other adults because Jesus gives me strength! 

(If you ever reflect on my interactions with you and you have a child I know, notice I often talk to the child first?  Yes, I’m so much more comfortable starting with the little ones!)

My challenge to myself is always to listen to God’s nudge of a quiet voice and offer encouragement to whomever He leads into my path.  I make it my challenge to you.  Encourage.  Even a smile and “Good Morning!” goes a long way sometimes!  I’m speaking from my own personal experience.  What you are really saying to that person is “I see you.”

Thank you to those who serve as greeters at our Good News Church!  Thank you for those who know my name!  Thank you for making me feel seen.  Thank you for encouraging me and helping me pass that on and encourage others.  If you are an encourager; KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK!

Thank you for reading,

Type at you next time!

~Nancy Tart

Evaluations

January 29, 2021

Evaluations

This week and next week are skills testing weeks at gym. Evaluations of skills each gymnast has and their ability to move up or stay in their current level to solidify their knowledge.

Most of the time, the coaches catch when their student gymnast gets enough skills and strength or knowledge to move up, but sometimes it takes a “skills test” for a gymnast to show off or put a little more power into her actions!

This made me think about life.

Life is full of levels.

Sometimes we just move through them seamlessly. You know, like gliding from toddlerhood to preschool, or moving from 9th to 10th grade. High school to college is a little more of a push – this is like an evaluation. Are you ready? Well, time is here – which choice do you make?

In our personal growth, we tend to move slowly. It’s when a climatic event causes us to evaluate ourselves that we discover strengths we didn’t know we had or weaknesses we thought we didn’t have. Your eldest child going to college and you are tossed into the whirlwind of various choices, plans, financial issues, helping your young adult navigate stress (praying you can do that well, because she is expressing what you are internalizing!), and believing that a way will be made.

This time you have to view as a positive change. You have to realize that this temporary negative appearance will prove to be the lifetime starting point for your young adult. Your attitude through this is your “evaluation,” your young adult will be taking notes on and remembering. (Everyone else in your household is also watching!)

Sometimes a life “evaluation” is others watching how you navigate troubled waters. Like the death of your father, your sister, your close friend, your child. Losing someone you treasure. That despair can allow you to create a pit to lose yourself in. Or you can look up and pull on the strength that only comes from Jesus. This evaluation is never something we want to face.

Evaluation week went along with my study: Examine yourself to see what is good and right; remove that which leads toward darkness.

(My paraphrase again, I summarized the page-long study to that line. Most of the verses linked all boiled down to that same line as my brain interpreted them.) I imagine darkness to be the depth of one’s soul without Jesus. Since Jesus is Light and darkness is the absence of light, that makes the most sense to me.

See, when trouble hits, I can either turn inside myself and go into darkness or look outside and reach up to Jesus. In Him there is strength to endure everything.

Life has taught me that.

My “evaluations” have proven it.

I pray I always choose to reach up. I want those watching me during “skills testing” to be led to Jesus. That is my goal.

Crazy writer’s brain that sees the little flyer on our desk that reads “skills testing weeks” and launches into deep thoughts… hopefully these wandering thoughts help lift you up!

Type at you later!

~Nancy Tart

My Little Learner

March 29, 2020

My Little Learner

Our gym has an after-school program where our comfy vans pick up from several area schools and bring little athletes back to gym. They do gymnastics, crafts, eat snacks, and do homework. Thea and her other gym baby friend sometimes hang out there. Thea loves it and thinks she’s a big kid! Just like at home, she tries to do school with them!

Especially when someone wants to play teacher! Ellie loves to play teacher and Thea loves to “learn” and she likes the chalkboard.

At home, Thea knows not to eat coloring tools like pencils, crayons, markers, and even paints! At Aunt Becca’s she got introduced to big sidewalk chalk and tasted it. Sister-cousin Anastasia laughed and said, “eww, gross Baby Thea, you color with it like me!”

Once Thea saw that, it was like “aha! this is an outside coloring tool!”

Sitting with Becky one day, she pulls up a pencil and paper and says “yeah!” and starts babbling in her own way, giving us serious glances as she explains what her work is. Jillian said, “Thea thinks she’s doing school!”

Thea and Becky are quite alike. Becky understood before her first year that coloring tools were not to be eaten too. Baby Becky never ate Legos (except for the black squishy tires, she called them gum and we had to remove them temporarily – I think she still secretly stashes them somewhere and chews them). Baby Becky was my earliest potty trainer (at 14 months telling us when she had to go & by 18 months in regular underwear – I have no clue how!) and Thea is already potty training herself. She got super excited when I bought a baby potty for her tiny self – and knows exactly what it’s for (showed us by pulling at her diaper so we took it off & she used the potty, I teased Becky that she may lose the designation of youngest potty trained).

I love watching my little love get more independent. Each one of them unique and special. Each has different strengths and weaknesses. Each helps the other in various tasks to make us a cohesive team – we build on each others’ strengths.

This is how we all should be. Learning, assisting, encouraging; each doing what we do best and helping when and where we can. It isn’t just for siblings or families. This understanding of the learning and growing and maturing process is an important life skill.

And Thea is playing in the grass without eating it – amazing! She is totally a little Becky… until Uncle Buddy came along and taught 2-year-old Becky she could eat dollar weed (and then she wouldn’t quit eating them!).

Thank you for Reading!

Type at you later,

~Nancy Tart

Targets

July 8, 2019

Targets

We have enough of a spot to set up our archery target (big fat canvas block thing) and our bb gun target (the windfresh bucket with three aluminum cans) and safely target shoot at those.

On perfect days when Mom and Dad are out, the question always comes, “may we set up the targets and shoot?”

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Anastasia rode Lucas’ bike between turns!

Christina prefers the bow and arrow – her “weapon from a more civilized age” as she mimics Obi-wan and Kimberly laughs.  Lucas is just learning to shoot with those.  We have a 10 pound bow and he can finally pull that one back.

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Jaquline and Jillian prefer using the bb rifle since our little Daisy is easier to load than the bows.  (and they are in front of the metal beam! no ricochets here!)

Kimberly likes both.  She’s a lot like me.  My favorite gift ever was my crossbow (which no, we can’t shoot here, but when we got it, I had space enough to use it).

Today, we’d backed the cars off of the carport and set up the targets.  Archery on the left and airgun on the right.  I was overseeing (and assisting with loading) the airgun shooters.  I’m not paranoid, but probably repeated “never point a gun at a person,” and “don’t load if someone is in your range of vision” a hundred times.  I like them to know how to shoot, but I want them to treat every weapon with respect.  Ocean, vehicle, weapon, hot stoves – anything with the possibility of causing injury – safety is the first priority.  Always err on the side of safety and you will eliminate possible accidents.

So for about an hour, I loaded the little Daisy and Jaquline, Jillian, Anastasia, Lucas, and Kimberly took turns taking three shots each at the three target cans.  A few “wow, you got all three!” and a few “oops, try again,” shouts.  They encouraged each other.

Sometimes you feel like you were aiming at something and the site is off.  You can’t hit it at all.  Sometimes everything falls down perfectly.  Life is unpredictable.  Sometimes your perception is off.  Sometimes something that looks perfect is lying.

Strange thoughts I have while the children are shooting?  I couldn’t get out of my mind how thoroughly I’d believed in the good while the truth was right online for me to see if I’d just searched the county records.  (I had to update my story)  I heard “Black Eyes Blue Tears” and cried.  I cried as the kids danced to “Fireflies” just a bit ago.  I pray for her ex-husband.  I pray that her babies remember her.

Briefly, thoughts like that interrupt my life now.  I am there, helping to load the bbs and saying, “yea!  You got them!” but I’m also crying inside because I was supposed to be there to protect her.  I watch Christina patiently help Lucas aim his bow.  I see her mouth move and I know she’s saying, “breathe out, release the string,” just like I did to her.  I teach them safety.  I teach them truth.  I teach them about life.  But I can’t protect everyone.  That reality hurts.

I pray daily for my children, nieces, nephews, the boys and girls in my gym classes, those I influence.  I pray they will find the true Protector in Jesus and follow His direction so their life will be anchored in love, truth, and joy.

I help Anastasia aim the rifle and she giggles when the bb hits the target box.  (The targets are supposed to be the cans, but the box counts too.)  I pray that God puts a hedge of protection around all of His precious children and keeps them safe from deceit.

Jillian and Anastasia are giggling while Jaquline grunts trying to pump the rifle because she’s too big for help.  It doesn’t seem that long ago that I was helping my baby sisters aim our old “red ryder” bb rifle down at the pond, popping off pinecone targets.  I can’t change the past.  I can help mold the future.

Hope.  Hope is what helps me through each day.

The girls are giggling again because Louis is pretending to close his eyes and act like he’s asleep.  It is easy to choose joy with these angels around.

Joy.  Yes, joy is my strength.  Thank you, Jesus, for giving me the strength to choose your joy!

Type at you next time,

~Nancy Tart

 

Fatherhood

June 17, 2019

Fatherhood

So, you know this huge thing called “Fatherhood?”

What comes to mind?  A parenting book I read when I was twelve (yes, oldest sibling perks!) said something like “the child’s view of God as a Father is directly impacted by their experience with their Earthly Father.”

Yes. So true.

I went into parenthood knowing this. (Songs like “He Wants to be Like Me” reaffirmed this giant responsibility.)

A Father is often the humor of the family too – in the photo, Louis had climbed to the top of the stump and challenged “Come Get Me!” … notice all the kids following!

Despite the failures that I’ve made as a Mom and that I felt repercussions of from my parents (they were AWESOME parents, but they weren’t perfect) – I understand the crux of all parenting: we are human.  We (Parents) are not Jesus and are not perfect.

Bingo.

That awesome thing called grace collaborates with the huge responsibility of parenting to create a vulnerable, praying, God-dependant parent capable of teaching the amazing love and grace of Jesus through their own transparency.

Let’s face it: most of the American culture makes fun of fathers.  (Ever seen the Goofy Salute to Fatherhood?) Even as early as the 1950s when there was still a bit of a patriarchal society present, cartoons and movies started to depict fathers as lazy, goofy, clueless bunglers who often caused more problems than they solved.

Although I laughed along with my Daddy at a lot of these early shots at the masculine father, I understood the bulk of media still left you understanding that the love and bond of a father to child was the glue of a family.  The unsung hero always was the silent sure strength of the God-following Father.

As time inched forward, the media continued to turn the American Father into a non-essential entity.

The opposite is true!

I consider myself a strong, independent woman when it comes to my life.  I am a Christian woman, but one of my strongest battles with myself is submission – first to my father, then to Jesus, and later to my husband.  I know this though…  I CANNOT be the mother I am without the encouragement and support from my husband.

If I had to do motherhood without my husband being my ultimate cheerleader and sounding board, I would have realized how unfit I am about three months into the first child.  I have the ultimate respect for people whose life circumstances have forced them to navigate parenthood alone.  I try to be an encourager to them and help those single parents in any way I can because I cannot imagine myself having that strength.

I am excited to be around my husband!  I was on a softball team (church, yes, I’m an athletic maniac but wasn’t on an actual team until I was in my late 20s and it was just for one season with my church family).  Louis was working sometimes 100+ hours a week for our family at the time.  The company I had just closed.  He’d never made it to any of our games (I took all the kids with me; they loved it and hung out with their friends & some of the church ladies who came to encourage us bounced my baby around).  One day he showed up and I was so excited!  (I was told I squealed like a little girl; don’t remember exactly.)  I love walking with him.  I am excited when we do something as a family – or when he’s going somewhere and says, “hey want to go with me?”  Because I know he likes his alone time.  I get way too much alone time at my office – I relish gym coaching because of the other encouraging women I work for and with and the chattering children I love.  I will chatter way too much sometimes.

Our church sermon was on how Fathers aren’t perfect (only Jesus is) and how their honesty and relationship is their connection with their children.  It’s the way to disciple.  We aren’t perfect, our children aren’t perfect – bingo!  Common ground.

I know how important real, honest, God-fearing Fathers are to the fabric of our family.  I know how hard it is to buck the media’s garbage portrayal of our roles and follow God’s plan instead.  I am so thankful that I have a husband who is pursuing God’s heart.  His passion for Jesus makes him a better husband, a better father, and a better friend.  He helps encourage me to pursue God’s heart.  (Told you I’m competitive.)  He isn’t perfect, but he is constantly improving.  A challenge arises and he rises above it.  He’s always leading in love and with a determined drive that is totally contagious.  His passion for Jesus, life, and family (okay, and sports) is encouraging.

And he doesn’t think he’s “so much” – he compliments and lifts me up consistently.  He makes me feel like I’m doing well despite whatever challenge I feel I’m failing.

At church, we pulled in on Father’s Day (neither of our fathers went to church as adults) and he comments, “wow, church is crowded on Father’s Day.”  Yes, at our church, the culture of encouraging each person to follow God individually, corporately, and in their family is persistent.  (I was afraid we lost that when our previous church folded.)  I am so encouraged that Louis has found a church with a culture of lifting up men as fathers; the vital leaders in their homes, encouraging and holding each other accountable.

Thank you, Jesus, for fathers who choose to take the hard road and follow you; they are raising up the next generation of world-changers.

Thanks for reading!

Type at you next later…

~Nancy Tart

The Rumble of Life

How I love the blessing of carrying life!

November 14, 2018

The Rumble of Life

Today I’m very thankful for life.

My little unborn angel is rolling around and kicking, punching, or whatever inside me with such force Lucas and Jillian keep giggling at my stomach bouncing!

What an honor it is to be able to carry a new life!

From the first flutter-kicks I felt of Christina’s 15 years ago, I have been awed by the honor of being pregnant.

So, maybe my body isn’t always so happy about it, but that’s fixed.  With Christina it was routine, wake up, eat, attempt a prenatal vitamin, upchuck said prenatal, get to work, run to the bathroom, there goes breakfast, and snack on some grapes or tuna salad very slowly throughout the day praying for no puking.

When I was pregnant with Becky I was under a midwife’s care and learned a ton about how nutrition affects pregnancy – then I managed to only upchuck every prenatal vitamin, mix, or powder I tried.  So I stopped trying new supplements and simply focused on very healthy foods.

Just as Kimberly started along, my sister introduced me to Shakeology (a meal replacement nutrition drink) and the nausea with every successive pregnancy was gone!  Great nutrition and my body tolerated it!  I was over that hurdle.

Today, as our baby entertains older siblings, I’m answering standard questions: “How big is my baby?” (Lucas says this baby is HIS baby) “What color will baby’s hair be?”  “When will my baby come out?” “How can baby be so strong already?” (This as Jillian’s hand was kicked off my belly.)

Their curiosity about new life reminds me of how fascinated I am by the whole process.  I have general answers to give: “about this big,” (thanks to our scientific knowledge) “only God knows,” “when Baby is ready,” and “because Baby is strong like his big sisters and brother.”  (I don’t like to say “it” when referring to the Baby, so if I have to use a pronoun, it’s going to be a masculine one – most of the time I can manage to just use “Baby” instead.  The kids pick the one they want to use.)

My favorite question comes from Jaquline today (and I know she’s a veteran of two water births and about ready for a deeper explanation, but for now she’s still just eight): “How did Baby get inside you?”

“God took a bit of Daddy and put it in Mommy and mixed it together and He started Baby growing.” (Very simple, but literally truth.  God set up everything and if He doesn’t choose to give the spark of life, the other stuff doesn’t matter.  That has been my standard answer to that question for 14 years.)

This makes Jillian giggle while Lucas lays his head, ear down, on my tummy and says, “I love you, Baby!  Thank you God for my baby!”

I wish I could pause that moment for a while.

Seconds later, they have raced back about daily things: Jillian is outside helping with morning chores, Lucas is vrooming a vehicle (I think it’s a wooden car) up the side of the couch, Jaquline is doing her schoolwork at the big table where Kimberly and Christina already have work laid out (although they popped up to take a break and feed livestock and pets) and Becky is lumbering about as she slowly wakes up.  Life.

Today is full of impending activity: midwife appointment, college classes for Becky, college field trip for Becky (Louis will drive everyone to the park and make a fun day out of it; perks of big sister in a marine biology class), work (coaching) for me, work for Louis, normal stuff.

I’m swiping a few minutes just sitting here relishing this rumble in my tummy and thanking God for allowed me to hold His little child.  Baby seems to realize the audience is gone and slowly curls up to rest.  Baby is always most active with Lucas comes and explains something (why cars roll, what the sky looks like, how the big rooster is scary to snakes, how an orange tastes, how excited he is for “Baby to finally come out so I can see you”).

I love you, Baby Tart!  Thank you, God, for my baby! (All of them!)

Thanks for reading!

Type at you next time…

~Nancy Tart

Electric Season

Energy resonates in the clear skies of the seasons changing to autumn.

October 31, 2018

Electric Season

It’s officially autumn.

To me, it never seems like autumn until the sky goes that gorgeous “sky blue,” gentle cooler breezes tousle our hair, and there is a crisp energizing feel in the air.

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During these days, I remember the exhilaration I felt as a child when they first approached.

Our first “autumn” day we’d race outside, full of a new form of energy that totally required an outdoor escape.  If there was a swingset in the yard, (sometimes just a rope with a stick at the bottom) we were trying to touch the sky with our feet!  On our bikes, (we called them horses, since we loved horses but never had a real one) we would ride round and round the house, singing Sunday School songs at the top of our lungs.  If I ever had to describe the feeling in one word, it would be “freedom.”

Today the gorgeous electric blue sky makes me think about how God arranges things in seasons in our lives.  Sometimes, when a new season comes, it brings the exhilaration of freedom.  I’ve felt it before and not understood why.

Life seems to say, “you are trapped more than before, why are you happy?”

But my heart answers with a song called “Happy” because one verse basically says: bring it on, I’m happy and nothing can change that!

I imagine myself telling life that sometimes.

Because I have my root of happiness in Jesus, His joy is my strength, and even if life wants to throw stuff at me and claim I’m worse off in this new season than I was before (usually it’s that I can’t see the positive just yet), I know God has me in His hands – and I choose to be filled with that freedom exhilaration that comes with this new season!

Whatever God has for us, I sense the excitement, and I choose to focus on joy!  Let this next season begin!

Thanks for reading!

Type at you next time…

~Nancy Tart

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