Tag: younglings

Shifting Time, Adapting Traditions

November 15, 2022

Shifting Time, Adapting Traditions


Yesterday a notification from my calendar app popped up on my phone.  It read, “Pearson Family Thanksgiving at Mom & Daddy’s.”  It was an old recurring appointment I’d just never deleted.  I guess I hoped we’d restart it someday.  The recurring day was always the 15th of November and time was set as 4pm to 7pm just because my app in 2010 with my first smartphone didn’t allow “all day” appointments to give me day-before notifications.

Why would our family Thanksgiving be on the 15th instead of the fourth Thursday of each November?

Good question: here’s the historical answer…

It started after the first year Louis and I got married.  We had just tried to do Thanksgiving at his family’s (Grandma Jeanette’s house) and then Thanksgiving at my family’s – and were exhausted and Louis complained he was too full from one place to eat half of what he wanted to taste at my parent’s house.  Same happened at Christmas!  At least the food part wasn’t a big issue at Christmas.  His family always did presents and stuff at the crack of dawn (not really, but early) and my family usually had a big breakfast, tried all the kids’ patience, setup everything, made sure all the service workers had gotten a good nights’ sleep so it was later and lasted longer.  Christmas was easy.  Morning with his family, afternoon with mine.  

Plus, as the second year holidays approached, we realized that three of us (Louis, Katy, and Becca) worked service industry and didn’t have the actual Thanksgiving Day off.  Hmm… That made the decision even easier!  I approached my Daddy with an idea: what if, we celebrated Thanksgiving on Mom’s birthday each year instead of actual Thanksgiving Day – of course, they could still do the actual Thanksgiving, but the Travel Thanksgiving Day celebration when we all got together would be Mom’s birthday.  Daddy said, “two feast days for Thanksgiving?  Great idea.”  (or something very similar to that, I don’t remember the exact words)

We started celebrating Thanksgiving with my family on November 15th, my Mother’s birthday!  It was perfect, service industry workers could easily ask and get a random day a week and a half before the start of the holiday rush (pre-Nights-of-Lights for us Saint Augustinians), and we’d always make or buy a cake for Mom!  It was perfect!  (Then we could go to our own thing or for us, go to Louis’ family celebration on Thanksgiving Day, if we were off – Louis usually tried to make an appearance; even it is was briefly.)

Lots of stuff has happened to my birth family and we’ve tried to keep that tradition alive, but it isn’t happening this year.  Instead, we are hosting Thanksgiving for anyone able from 11/23 to 11/27.  A few of our family will be in town and able to visit.  Maybe some friends might pop in over those off-days (we are off work and the girls on break from college, Louis is on call, but he’s always on call) – family and friends make for fun days full of memories!  

I smiled at the notification because it today would mark four full years since we’d gone over to Mom and Daddy’s for “Pearson Thanksgiving on Mom’s Birthday” and all my older girls remember “two Thanksgiving parties” every year!  Lucas attended some, but doesn’t remember them.  Thea hadn’t ever been.  

So many things shifted in our family that now, getting days off before Thanksgiving, when most of us are on vacation is like “really?” and two of our children are grown (okay, Becky’s not legally an adult yet, but I consider her one) so I want our home to be the gathering place.  I want to be like Grandma Jeanette, the “glue” that holds the family together.  I want everyone to feel welcome and this year we’ve officially started opening our home to anyone during holidays (it feels like we have more space even though we don’t).  Not that we didn’t say it before “oh, you can just come by” no, this year we sent out timelines to family and have offered verbal invitations to friends of our kids and their families.  I want to be the fun memory-making place – and it won’t matter that we won’t be in this house next year for any of the fall holidays, our new place will be the new gathering place.  I want to build memories so my younglings keep coming back – even if one day they show up and say, “Dad, Mom, can we do Thanksgiving at your house on your anniversary instead of actual Thanksgiving Day?” – and yes, we’ll shift with the time to accommodate what our youngsters and their growing families need… but that’s WAY in the future, right?  

(Who am I kidding?  It seems like yesterday I proposed the question to my Daddy…)

Thank you for Reading!

Type at you next time!

~Nancy Tart

Exploring Big Sister’s Campus

I love watching the younglings do something new; why I love just walking and exploring. We can always find something to enjoy when we slow down and ignore the overbearing stresses of life. Take a break. Make yourself take a break.

Exploring Big Sister’s Campus

Throwback Story from (October 24, 2021)

I am sitting with Thea at the side of a pool on the Embry-Riddle campus because we chose to ride down with Christina for her Sunday afternoon flight block.  Thea is laughing at pictures “Anastasia and the Bunny-Bear” from Easter at gym.  (The Bunny-Bear is the Easter Bunny outfit Jaquline & Kimberly wore.)  “The Bunny-Bear loves my gymnastics!” Thea says and laughs.

She jumps around; we’ve already walked the campus and she’s pointed out “safe” lizards (I told her here the lizards are not allowed to be chased) and flowers and bumble bees and honeybees and “boys and girls at Christina’s school.”  She’s asked me almost everyone’s name.  “What’s that boy’s name?” “Who is that girl?” “Are they all Christina’s friends at school?” (She goes to gym-school and all of those participants are her friends, so she assumes everyone at the school you go to are your friends.)

After listening to my stressed-out teenagers discussing life in the early afternoon, I’m convinced I didn’t do a great job of teaching them how to enjoy life and be grateful for the moment they are in.  Sometimes that is really, really hard.  Sometimes life’s circumstances don’t seem good.  Sometimes it’s hard to be grateful – but you have to!  I usually feel like I’m enjoying what I am in.  I am grateful for the life I have; I love my family, my job, my church – those are the important things!  I am so happy for the amazing things God keeps doing in our lives!

Christina and her educational journey is a continuing story of how God keeps answering prayers!

I’m so thankful for the people God has put and keeps putting in the path of my teenagers and young children through church, gym, and friendships.  Becky has learned so much from the mentors in her life.  Kimberly has positive role models who keep encouraging her. 

Our journey has been full of ups and downs like any life story.  We have to find the positive and focus on that.  Like right now.  Thea is running around on the “Water-bridge” after touching the “scary man” (metal statue of Wilber Wright) tentatively.  She’s singing something I can’t figure, likely made up, and I’m typing. 

Perfect contentment while exploring the strange surroundings that are Christina’s school.  I’m sure I’ll hear lots of stories about the man, the critters, and the “boys and girls” she discovered. 

I love watching the younglings do something new; why I love just walking and exploring.  We can always find something to enjoy when we slow down and ignore the overbearing stresses of life.  Take a break.  Make yourself take a break. 

Enjoy the slow down.

It makes life more fun!

Type at you later!

~Nancy Tart

Read Me A Story

Read Me A Story!

February 21, 2020

One of the things I like best in the whole world is to read books. Aloud. To children.

Don’t get me wrong, I love reading personally too, but there is just something so amazing about getting to play all characters in a book for wide-eyed child audiences. My first audiences were my younger siblings – actually, most of them were just trapped. It’s like “not again!” but one or two would be like “yes! read this one!”

One of my biggest encouragers in my writing was my youngest brother. His favorite read-aloud story is actually completed (a trilogy, actually) but because of my perfectionist nature, needs tons of work before I would publish them. So Olivia and Alex will be left right there in our imaginations for now… The next one he wanted me to read was “Web of Deception” in which I created a character to “be him.”

Along came my own children; to whom I read old stories and created the Long Tails, Funny Sisters, and Devonian series for.

And Becky begging for more “Pirate Baby Story” – I wanted to see the sparks of interest in reading. Reading is the open door to so much knowledge.

Now I’m sitting on my comfy bed with Lucas and Thea, starting “Fibbing Fisherman” (Lucas calls it “the fish boy that Becky draws” because Becky illustrated the cover). Jillian hears and lumbers in from her spot on the couch (did I really just draw her away from a movie). Kimberly hops in, “are you reading?”

The last big one was Voyage of the Dawn Treader. (I love the Narnia books!) I’m always reading something – in progress on a big one and reading through little ones at least one in a sitting. They fall asleep around me – the big kids hadn’t even shown up at the fishing spot yet – as I read and pretend I’m each different character. We discuss each decision as the characters make them because most of the time book readings are interrupted by “why’d he do that?” or “what was she thinking?” questions. (YIPPEE! time for socratic questions to answer these and get their own mental gears turning!)

I hope I’ll always be reading so someone. I don’t really read to Christina anymore. Sometimes Becky will wander in when it’s a book she likes or when she wants to read (she is a great oral expressionist – I expect she could be a great speaker or do drama or some such). Right now, I’m happy to be in the stage I’m at where there are still some younglings begging, “Read me a Story, please?”

Treasure each moment, it turns into a memory as soon as it passes.

Type at you later!

~Nancy Tart

And… It Happened!

Look out world! Here comes a full confident young woman who continually amazes her family! #ProudParent #WeLoveYou

And… IT Happened!

January 9, 2020

I am at work, minding my own business, trying to focus solely on work.

*BLING* No noise, though, because my phone is on silent like it should be.

I glance at it laying on the desk.

WHAT!

“Mom, which day is good for University tour? I need it for my scholarship application next year.”

I reread that with bugged out eyes.

Yes, next year. Like, application to be delivered in the beginning of fall 2020. Where did time run?

Fast forward to the day before said university tour date (I’ve already asked for the day off months ago & am really excited about visiting this place!).

*BLING*

Um… Really? It’s lunch, though (oddly she seems to understand the no-phones-during-work concept already), so I look.

I get a picture… it’s an outline of our entire day, which not only includes the long drive, university tour, campus discussion, and such, but also squeezes in “appointment at DMV.”

Wait. What appointment? It’s Jaquline’s 10th birthday – my mind instantly pops to Kimberly and Jaquline’s open request for their FL IDs. Nope. Three dots (means she’s typing another text) pop up…

“Oh, that’s because 01/07 is when I can get my real driver’s license & I already booked the appointment so we will just make it if there’s traffic.”

I laugh out loud.

I could say impressed, but I’m not really. I know my young woman very well. She knows that if she wants something, she has to set it all up and make it happen. Expecially since I’ve been working full-time now, all of the girls have become far more independent. Before it was my policy that if they wanted something (plan an outing, attend an event, join a club/group, get a job, etc.) that wasn’t a family thing, I would help research and direct, but they had to do the paperwork, calling, or whatever else that had to be done. Now, though, my free time at home is taken up with the younglings doing really basic stuff like verifying schoolwork, going over new concepts again, attempting to train basic manners and such in two of three hours without feeling like a joy-leech (more on that to come later), and other such. Sometimes I feel like I never get to talk to my teens & preteen.

Driving them places was my only dedicated time to talk with them… I’m not sure I want her to have her license…

Nothing is going to slow her down.

I love that she’s so independent and self-reliant. I love that she has goals and makes things happen to reach them.

…I’ve been in thought too long, the three dots come back…

“It shouldn’t take too long. I made an appointment.”

So I send a smiley face. (I didn’t even realize the DMV was open that late)

*Pause for the tour… and the sweet story of this picture!*

The above picture was her grabbing a “quick selfie” with me as Dad stopped for his breakfast after the tour – “we have to have one picture from the tour with both of us!” (My heart almost melted, I had several pictures of her, just none of me... she meant she wanted a picture with me.)

Fast forward to January 7th, and I’m typing on a blog after driving Christina to her appointment. I’m waiting for my sixteen year old to get back from her test. She’s about to step into a new level of independence.

I’m not really scared – though most people say I should be.

I trust that she’s learned well. I trust that she will make safe, wise decisions. Mostly, this peace I’m carrying is because I know regardless of what I want, I can only hold her hand for so long – I have to let her grow. I let her go into God’s hands… back into God’s hands, actually. Not that she ever left His care, just that he entrusted Louis & I with her for a while. A few short years in the span of life… we get to hold, love on, teach, and enjoy our younglings as they learn in a safe, protected environment.

The ultimate test is what they do once they leave.

I see her trying to hide her excitement – CAP has taught her that – as she comes back in. She needs me to come to the agent’s window. I smile as I mentally ask myself, “is this the last time I’ll need to sign something for her to give permission?” (She’s not 18, so silly question, but that’s what my mind says to me.)

She passed (no, I’m not surprised) and we drive home. I tease her that I could take a nap in the backseat now.

Someone asked me, “aren’t you worried about her driving the interstate after…?” They didn’t complete it but my head did, “…you just lost Mary there.”

No. “Why not?”

I asked myself the same thing as Kimberly and Christina loaded up in “Old Blue” (her name for her car) in their ABUs and my oldest and preteen drove out on their first solo drive. “Why aren’t you worried?” – and I give myself the same answer I gave that person, “Jesus is in charge of my heart and hers.”

I’m secretly thrilled beyond measure of the whole university experience she will launch into next year. I’m excited for her getting to drive at 16 (I was 19 when I got my first driver’s license). I’m so proud of her I sometimes feel my heart might bust. And this is just the beginning… New stage, for me and for Christina.

This year, 2020, has already seen my first university tour (Christina), first fully licensed driver (Christina), and Kimberly’s first long trip away from home. 2020 will include: oldest trio’s first summer camp together, Christina’s first solo flight, Lucas’ starting kindergarten, Becky’s learner’s permit, and Kimberly’s Vyteen account. By their plans; Kimberly wants to take the PERT, Jaquline & Kimberly plan to be team gymnasts, Kimberly wants to be C/Sgt before summer… and those are just the ones I currently know about… I’m blessed to be their mom. I’m super excited for them.

Jesus is in charge of my heart and theirs. I have a peace as they grow that some people just don’t understand… but my joy in their achievements is something everyone can relate to!

Type at you later,

~Nancy Tart

Meet Swan, Tiger, and Grizzly

Here are Becky and Christina’s newest triplets – Swan, Tiger, and Grizzly! Cuddly balls of fur and cuteness!

January 24, 2019

Meet Swan, Tiger, and Grizzly!

Becky and Christina’s guinea pigs had three little piglets!  (Taylor, mom, is Christina’s whom we adopted, and Becky’s TobyMac was purchased with the store employee promising he was really a she… read here for that story!)

So about every six months or so, our little piggies pop out a couple of new piglets.  First was our Sweet Potato, who went to a lovely home near ours.  The last was another trio.  The girls take finding a home for their sweet babies a big responsibility!

Becky finds a “theme” for their names.  The first one was vegetable, the second one was desserts, and this one is animals.

20190120_143535_1548013071579.jpg

This is Swan.

20190120_143606_1548013071771.jpg

Tiger (so named for the white stripe)

20190120_143631_1548013072149.jpg

 And Grizzly (coloring played a role in this one’s name)

We don’t know the sex of these little piglets just yet because Becky thinks they are “too comfy” snuggling with Mommy and Daddy to “invade” and examine them.  Toby is such a devoted Daddy to the piglets.  He will even make a growling fussy noise if one of the girls opens the nursery roof when he’s bringing grass up to Taylor while she’s nursing the piglets. (They like fresh Spanish Needles better than even Timothy Hay!)

20190120_143649_1548013072995.jpg

20190120_143722_1548013073617.jpg

But when the adults come down to take a baby break, the girls get to peek at the babies!  When it is cool, as it has been lately, we don’t take them out of their protection until they are better able to regulate their body temperature.  Baby Guinea Pigs are born fully furry, eyes open, scampering about, and almost independent. (They will nurse from mom for 3 to 6 weeks, but start eating fresh grass brought up by Daddy almost immediately!)

In the cycle of our little farm the younglings get to see birth, life, and death as it plays out in seasons on a smaller scale than in our own lives.  We are honored to see births and become responsible for the small life gifted to us (yes, even the frog egg cluster they saved from the drying pool and hatched them to “save them” from drying up).  We will keep one or two of these little angels as they become permanent members of our little tribe.  I love how tenderly the girls take care of their animal responsibilities – Lucas calls them “my animal friends.”

Thanks for reading!

Type at you next time…

~Nancy Tart

Follow me!

Get my latest posts delivered to your email: