Tag: young woman

And We All Made It!

December 31, 2023

And We All Made It!

Butterflies swam in my heart, stomach, mind… anywhere… everywhere all at once.  

I’m sitting in one of the folding seats in the Ocean Center with a baby nursing… I’ve been here, done that before, but never have I been in this venue for the event that is unfolding before me.  

A cycle of pictures of young men and women in more childish images showed on the screen that usually displayed my gymnasts’ scores.  

My gymnasts are sitting in the row behind me because our group of twelve takes almost two whole rows.  They are not in warm-ups cheering teammates, but keeping siblings entertained as they all wait for Christina. 

Marching Music!  

There they come!  Hundreds of young people in black gowns and caps.  Christina has a decorated cap with a quote from The Hobbit.  Her cap is bright green – and that makes her easy to pick out of the sea of black gowns and caps.  

Christina is graduating with her 4-year-degree from Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University!  Her graduation from high school with her AA degree from St Johns River State was the first college graduation ceremony I’d attended.  I look around me at six of my other seven children and my niece.  I smile; it definitely won’t be the last!

Everyone is waving and trying to get Christina to see them.  Christina’s fiancé was also watching along with some of his family a little higher up in the arena!  Kimberly is impressed with this use of the floor that she’s been competing on for three seasons and will be coming to again in 2024.  

The keynote speaker starts: Rebeccah’s plane hasn’t yet landed.  Louis is monitoring that.  The keynote speaker’s last encouragement?  “Adapt and overcome” – my Daddy said that all the time.  It almost made me feel like he was watching.  

A text.  Rebeccah’s plane landed.  She’s getting a taxi from the airport.  It’s a couple of miles.  She’d managed to get out of her college classes and work early so she could catch the earliest flight from Pensacola to Daytona.  I had prayed she would get to the venue to see Christina walk.  

I walked out to change Laud the same time as Louis said Rebeccah was here but not sure how to get in.  I walked to meet her; she is very enterprising and self-reliant so had discovered the entry herself.

We took our seats.  

Christina’s group of graduates stood.  My crew waved and Christina looked up to see Rebeccah here.  

We were all present.  

Louis, me, Rebeccah, Kimberly, Jaquline, Jillian, Lucas, Theadora, Laud.  Grandma Tina.  Aunt Becca and Anastasia.  Louis had his mom on video phone or something like that.  She said she was watching it live-streamed.  All of Louis’ and my little Tart clan was here to cheer on our Christina as she graduated.  

Our determined, ambitious, perfectionist whose smile lights up rooms.  October had been her 20th birthday.  My mind flew backward to that box of confetti in plane shapes.  She’d been accepted to the only university she wanted to attend: and Louis and I wondered how we would pay for it.  Scholarships, grants, loans, and flight training on a few credit cards – she’d worked as much as possible to make it happen.  We’d helped some.  Christina had made it happen.  

Christina walked up to get her diploma.  With honors.  (My perfectionist was bummed she didn’t make “with highest honors”) She did her little dance move she did at her “high school” graduation.  She looked up and beamed at us.  I am so proud of her!  (And Thea yells “you got this!” – even though it wasn’t a gymnastics meet)  

All of us were there.  Sure, our baby won’t remember it.  He actually slept through the keynote speaker and woke just before Christina walked.  Thea and Lucas will remember playing and being bored, respectively.  From Anastasia up to Rebeccah though; they know it’s a big deal.  They know, with varying degrees of understanding, how much work Christina put into getting to this goal.  They watched, with varying degrees of understanding, as she studied, worked, stressed, complained, forced herself to take fun breaks once in a blue moon, prayed, and pushed on.  

With Little Cousin
Mom, Graduate, Grandma
With Littlest Sister
Our Graduate!
Sister-Cousins

We all celebrated with Christina. 

I am so thankful for miraculous appearing of funding at needed times.  I am so thankful for my determined young woman who made her goal happen.  I will cherish this memory.  

Soar high Christina!  Remember what your determination and ambition made happen!  God opens doors but you have to choose to walk through them!  Your graduation didn’t happen “just because” – there were lots of late nights, missed sleep, forcing yourself to go to work when you wanted to sleep in, exams you stressed far too much over, budget cuts to pay for the next simulator, and other challenges you rose to and overcame.  

Keep on flying high – you are “forever an eagle” now!

Thank you for reading!

Type at you next time!

~Nancy Tart

Growing Young Women

December 28, 2023

Growing Young Women

It struck me with a text I sent: I have the littles at gym with me

I had Jillian, Lucas, Thea, and Laud.  

Half of our “biggers” are actually adults.  That’s a strange place to realize I am at.  I paused a moment, glancing at my phone on my work desk.  The notice underneath my text went from “sent” to “read” and I smiled.  I thanked God for the honor of having so much time with my growing young women.  I thanked Him for getting to mother so many of His children.  (My heart reminded me that we get them for a short time.) 

I don’t want to think about that.  

My heart loves that they love to do stuff together.  Like when they got a “big girl trip” for their combined birthdays.  Such happy faces!

Now we are nearing the end of Rebeccah’s winter break. (I didn’t want to think about that, either.) Soon those giggles across the table at meals, board games, and roblox and minecraft shenanigans, the gamer shouts from the newly re-setup PS1 and Xbox in the playroom, and the kitchen laughter will again be missing our Rebeccah.  I am so thankful for her beautiful life!  I love the connectivity and humor she brings.  I miss her when she’s gone.  I thanked God for Rebeccah.  I pray she will always choose to talk to me when she needs to.  I pray I am keeping our communication open.  I pray she chooses wisdom. 

Kimberly and Jaquline go back to their respective schedules (as does everyone else) and move forward in their busy study, work, and training lives.  Kimberly recently found a friend who encourages her in faith and sports commitment; a very good thing for her at this time.  I thanked God for Kimberly.  I pray she chooses wisdom as she keeps moving toward her long-term goal of studying sports medicine or physical therapy.  She has such a heart for healing (and preventing injury) and an intuitive understanding of how the body works.  

Jaquline has recently started to focus her studies on law and debate – her new goal is to be a lawyer.  She does have a way of getting people to see merit in her direction.  I laugh sometimes at her logic.  She has such a wonderful attitude about life and her cheerfulness is catchy.  She takes the responsibility of helping raise children so seriously – she assists in the nursery and I often hear her say “my babies.”  She has a helpful heart and wants to see everyone treated fairly.  I thanked God for Jaquline.  I pray she continues to seek God and chooses wisdom in her life’s path.

Christina, our first with a Bachelor’s degree, is stepping forward toward her career.  She continues to live with us.  I am so thankful that she stays close.  I feel honored that she chooses to keep talking with me. I thank God for Christina.  I pray she seeks God in all aspects of her life.  I pray she chooses to chase her dreams and grab opportunities that arise.  I pray she chooses wisdom and can live with no regrets.  Christina has a mothering soul.  Her determination and ambition have served her well so far!

I love all stages of our family life.  Today I’m grateful for being able to watch our little girls grow into vibrant young women.  I am thankful I still get to be a part of their lives.  I am reminded that just as we can contain multiple emotions at once, our homes can contain multiple stages at once.  Thank you, Jesus, for the honor of being a mother.  

Thank you for reading!

Type at you later!

~Nancy Tart

Thankfulness 2022

This year it may be a little premature, but I’m super excited about the amazing things. #Thankful #Gratitude #PensacolaChristianCollege #EmbryRiddleAeronauticalUniversity #LifeJourney #Children #GoodNewsChurch #WGVGymnastics #Education #Thankfulness

Thankfulness 2022

September 27, 2022

Each year I try to reflect on what God has done in our lives this past year. 

This year it may be a little premature, but I’m super excited about the amazing things.  I love to brag on what God has done!

I’ve been working for WGV Gymnastics (dream job I wanted my whole life but didn’t know it).  Louis is coming up on two years of working for Heritage Funeral Home.  I am super thankful for our Christian work environments and Christian bosses. 

Christina is happily pursuing her dream with passion, determination, and enthusiasm.  She is still at Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University full time, working at WGV Gymnastics part-time, and babysitting, dogsitting, and housesitting on the side.  She is an amazing big sister!  Her little gymnasts love her!  She serves in the nursery at Good News Church at least three times a month and loves “her babies” – yes, they become hers for an hour or so.  I am so thankful for Christina!

Becky has thrown some shocking curveballs at us and is away at Pensacola Christian College.  Same state, yes, but an hour earlier in time than we are.  (Different time zone, as she’s under Alabama on the panhandle – Lucas and Thea point out on the big map on the wall at church every morning when we get their lemon tea “there’s Becky!”) I am so proud of her!  She’s exploring and learning and growing – such an amazing young lady I am so blessed to be her mom!  Thank you, Jesus, for Becky!

Kimberly can legally drive… (REALLY???  I can’t believe she’s 15!)  She’s learning so much in schoolwork academically, in gymnastics physically, and in life with maturity as she grows and takes on so much responsibility!  Kimberly’s plans are impressive.  Her determination is a trait so many people comment on to me – as a youngling, it was labeled stubbornness, but now that she knows how to focus, it’s determination.  Kimberly is a competitive gymnast at WGV Gymnastics, a gymnastics coach part-time at WGV Gymnastics, serves in kid’s ministry at Good News Church at least twice a month, and dogsits occasionally.  (She is working toward her claimed goals of saving for a computer for college this spring and a car next fall.)  I am so thankful for Kimberly!

Jaquline is Christina’s twin.  Sometimes Christina’s gymnasts see Jaquline and give her hugs saying “hi! Coach!” which makes Jaquline smile proudly and Christina jealous.  “You’re stealing my hugs!” Christina has been known to say later.  Jaquline has grown in her relationship with Jesus so much in the last year.  She serves in the church nursery at least twice a month.  She occasionally volunteers at WGV – or works cleaning to “get Christina out faster.”  Jaquline continues to work toward her goal of team gymnast someday – she loves Beam and said she wished there was a Beam only competition.  Thank you, Jesus, for Jaquline!

Jillian is facing the challenges that come with entering double digits.  The want of being treated as an adult yet the want of continuing childish foolishness.  She’s maneuvering that with the cornerstone of knowing that Jesus can lead her through anything.  She loves her kid’s ministry leaders at Good News Church.  She loves her coaches at WGV Gymnastics (she’s a competitive gymnast).  She loves her friends and I see her making some lifelong friendships, if she can hold them.  She is leaping forward in academics!  I am so thankful for Jillian!

Lucas is an unstoppable force of limitless energy!  He is always running a one-man football game where he is the quarterback, receiver, kicker, lineman, and fullback all at the same time.  When he catches his own forward pass, I’ll have seen everything.  He begs me for a brother almost every day.  He is super thankful for his “gym brothers” and his “best friends.”  I am super thankful for these young boys and young men God has set around Lucas to help him enjoy being a little boy and slowly teach him how to be a young man.  Lucas gives 110% to everything he touches.  His passion and enthusiasm will help fuel his discovery stages as he grows.  He loves gymnastics.  He loves being strong.  He loves mud and football and big trucks and being like dad.  Thank you, Jesus, for Lucas!

Theadora is no longer the baby.  She is a “big girl” or a “young lady” all the time.  Though she loves snuggling (I’m so glad she hasn’t grown out of that yet), she is quick to say “I’ll do it myself!” and proceed to do just that.  Theadora has a bold confidence that comes from running the gym at the age of two.  She doesn’t care to keep up pretences, what you see is what you get – at times like that I think of her as “Becky junior.”  This confidence and determination will carry her far.  She “signs her name” as TTT and says, “see, I’m triple T,” they are left all over Coach Heather’s desk as “swips” for Coach Heather along with who-knows-what-it-should be doodles.  I am so thankful for Theadora!

I love the stage God has us in!  I’m so thankful to be here and alive and enjoying every minute of our time together and apart.  I love our family.  I’m so grateful to see our younglings grow and become young women (and eventually, a young man)!  Thank you, Jesus, for the honor of giving life and raising children!  I’m so overwhelmed with gratitude to you, Jesus, for my totally amazing family!

Thank you for reading.

Type at you next time,

~Nancy Tart

Stretching Her Eagles’ Wings

Enjoy each moment! We know our children are “on loan” from God for a little while & then they take flight! Enjoy this adventure, Becky!

Stretching Her Eagles’ Wings

August 28, 2022

Part of our educational philosophy is never to hold anyone back.  That is sometimes the hardest part of being a homeschool mom, at least for me. 

Friday, Christina, Louis, Thea, and I drove Becky to Pensacola Christian College for the start of her next level.

The car trip was fun.  Louis and Christina kept playing songs Becky likes and saying, “oops, that’s not classical or hymns” which made everyone laugh and several discussions of songs and lyrics and morality erupt.  We didn’t stop as often for potty or snack breaks as Louis thought we’d have to (Thea was too entertained with her big sisters and Christina, Thea, and I packed a bunch of snacks). 

The campus was huge and iconic.  Beautiful brick and magnificent stately trees reflected tradition and integration.  I’m a bit nerdy; I loved the architecture and old fashioned style.  Everything was electronic though!  I had received an email asking for a physical copy of a specific document – and being leery of electronic access as I am, I brought the actual paper.  Didn’t need it.  The electronic version of the printed paper in my purse “transferred” perfectly from St Johns River without a thing from me.  As Becky’s “authorized parent,” I was able to load into a portal on my phone that allowed me access to maps, her mailbox information, orientation information, even schedules and everything as if I were the student – Becky said it was creepy, I thought it was cool!

After crossing off the seven things (five on the “welcome” list, but with Becky under eighteen there were two paperwork drop offs and as she’s in the work program, she had a task for that as well) Becky had to do and being as much help (okay, Becky would call it hindrance) as possible, we decided (not precisely accurate, Louis decided) to go have a late lunch together just off campus. 

Someone likes Becky’s new spot!

Mellow Mushroom.  In Pensacola?  I thought the one on Anastasia Island was the only…  oops.

Finally, I ended up with a picture of my college girls.  They thought it cool because both are Eagles and blue & gold & white.  (Kimberly got in on that because she took her SAT at Pedro Menendez High School so she considers herself a “Falcon” and even has a Pedro Menendez Vystar card!  She pulled it out and showed them the blue & yellow colors – “A falcon is a type of eagle” Kimberly claims.)  Becky laughed because she and Kimberly plan on being Gators when they head for their Masters & Doctorate.  (“trading the gold for orange” they claim) Remember that mustard yellow skirt?  Becky’s pairing it with her beautiful navy blue blouse turns her outfit into her college colors!

I’ve been listening a lot to college plans since we encourage studying the path to what they want to do and finding various ways to access that final goal.  There was a lot of path and plan discussion on that road trip. 

I’m so proud of Becky for taking flight!  I pray she has a wonderful experience and learns a lot.  I pray she makes friends and connections that will last a lifetime!  I pray she does her best.  Her best right now is amazing me.  I’m truly excited for her entering this stage. 

Thank you, Jesus, for making it possible for us to help our children pursue their dreams!  Thank you that each of them wants to help the other.  Thank you that each wants to invest in their own education by working for it both financially and mentally.  I’m so thankful for the blessing of Becky in my life!  Thank you, Jesus, for allowing me the honor of being her mother! 

As I’m driving back home, chatting with Christina as Thea and Louis sleep in the back, I think on how parents only really get to father or mother their children for a few years – they are on loan from God anyway as all of them are God’s children entrusted to us.   “21 years” by TobyMac came on the radio followed by “Cinderella” by Stephen Curtis Chapman… God knows how music touches me.  One bit in the “21 years” song that makes me smile is “21 years, what a beautiful loan,” (I thank you Jesus, for trusting us and “loaning” Becky – and the others, but this thought was really about Becky – to us) and in “Cinderella” the bit is “but I know something the prince never knew,” [meaning they grow up and go] and yes, girls become young women, make their own decisions, and I pray mine know they can still talk to me about anything. 

Enjoy your “loans” with your littles!  Enjoy every bit you can.  God has trusted us with training and raising His beautiful children!  Just like I love watching “my little gymnasts” (those I’ve coached, usually as preschoolers) as they rise, I love watching my girls become young ladies. 

I love you, Becky!  Let your light shine!  Enjoy this adventure called life!  Every day is a gift from God; that’s why it’s called the present!

Thank you for reading.

Type at you later,

~Nancy Tart

Rejoice 2020 – Becky

November 18, 2020

Rejoice 2020 – Becky

Towards the end of the year, I always begin to reflect on the changes that have occurred in the year. Overall, they end up being positive – and those are my highlights. As it is close to Thanksgiving, I thought I’d brag a bit as I ponder on the changes I’ve seen in Becky this year.

Becky started 2020 discovering that she enjoyed the sport of gymnastics! I loved that because since I work at WGV Gymnastics, we get to drive together and she is the default DJ in our car because she picks up on the moods and knows how to use music to make everyone dance. I love spending extra time with my children!

She overcame a lot of obstacles that this unusual (if I hear the other word again – and you know which one – I will shriek!) year has thrown at her. Like our family has done, she pulled herself up, found either another way or something else, and managed to rise out with a smile!

Smile! Oh yes, one of Becky’s highlights of the year were her braces! She finally overcame a bad habit that kept her from getting braces (power of determination) and can now accurately be called “metal-mouth” until near the end of next year. She’s doing a great job of keeping them maintained and cleaned. She has been dreaming of braces and straight, beautiful teeth forever… but then, she still wants to major in orthodontics or some branch of dentistry.

Becky also managed to embark on two new ventures right as she turned fifteen:

First, she started a job. I never would have guessed that between “afternoon two shifts” and “morning three shifts” she would take “Preschool Program Coach” in the mornings. Becky is totally my night owl, so this did surprise me. She does this well.

Second – watch out world – she got her learner’s permit for driving.

And a phone. She pays for her own phone now.

I’m totally amazed and very proud of my little lady (okay, tall young lady who has been taller than me for a while) and her accomplishments this year. Becky has been working on herself. She is learning to understand herself and others around her. I see more empathy from her.

I pray for her daily as she begins to try her young adult wings in the world of “adulting” – as my teenagers call working, classes, activities, volunteering, and paying bills.

She dreams of building an aviary for her little feathered loves (parakeets now) that will allow her to add finches, lovebirds, and even more avian pets. I see that being accomplished soon because she is smashing through everything and accomplishing what she wants. Her determination is a very strong thing. Her ability to work through challenges and keep her word makes me proud. I know God has wonderful plans for her now and in her future.

Thank you, Jesus, for allowing me to have your beautiful daughter to raise! She is learning to lean on You and trust You in everything. She is loved so much by her family and even more by You – I pray You protect her, guard her heart, build her self-esteem, show her Your love and bring those You want guiding her into her life.

I hope this total Mom-blog piece today encourages you to find the positives and look at the accomplishments of your little blessings through this tough year. What did you see that made you smile? What challenge did your child find a creative solution too? Rejoice in the positives!

Thank you for reading!

~Nancy Tart

Dating Decisions – Part 4

Dating Decision Part 4: Dissecting Real Life and True Love #DatingDecision #Decision #Dating #Focus #Choice #Purity #Liberating #Saving #Love #Understanding #Choices #Allow #Marry #Marriage

September 23, 2020

Dating Decisions Part 4

If you’ve kept with this series so far, you know I’m almost 18 in the story now. I’ve been studying myself, trying to shift my focus to Jesus and become the woman I know He wants me to be. I’ve been people watching everyone. I am still very shy around my peers. I am only comfortable talking about dreams and hopes and principles; not very good at small talk. I die after “I’m good, how are you?” But ask my opinion on something and you get more than you wanted. I am a good listener. I sort people into boxes depending on what they tell me: mental boxes labeled, “stay away,” “like to be friends,” “want to learn more from,” and “never in a million years.”

I hit 18.5, had gone out to Disney Springs with several friends from work twice (which my Daddy fully encouraged and wanted to know if we’d met any guys… no, we goofed off, went to a comedy show, watched the two oldest drink “Monkey Brains” from a monkey-head mug and get sillier by the second, sang along with a band, people watched, danced line dances at the country bar, and did cartwheels on the AMC stars waiting for my mom & the two other younger friend’s rides). After relaying this to my Daddy, he shook his head and said, “that sounds like ten year olds instead of adults!” I grinned, “but it sounds like friends hanging out in your stories.” Yes. I was crazy.

I was working at Disney and during the few lunch breaks I took, I joined the two other girls who claimed to be Christ-followers and we encouraged each other. It shocked me. Of all who asked me out there, every one of the “boys” (I refused to call them men per my Daddy’s earlier definition) expected a date to end with sex. No. No dating for me. At 18, getting a little bolder, I had started wearing a silver ring with my birthstone that my Daddy had given me a few years back for a birthday gift. I told anyone who asked me out that it was my virginity ring and a symbol of the vow I made to save myself for my future husband. That kept a few of the nicer “boys” from trying to ask me out. One named Guy said, “awesome, sister!” overhearing my spiel and encouraged with, “keep it up.” No, he didn’t ask me out; none of the few single “men” I met asked me out at this point.

The most important step in my dating decisions came when I left Kissimmee. I moved the last time with my parents (told my Daddy, “just one more time.”) and once in Saint Augustine I became an assistant in our youth group. I saw so much sadness and pain in the preteen girls I tried to mentor. This was the first time I agreed to help out with teaching youth. I prayed for each girl by name.

I discovered that the most important part of any girl’s life was to fall in love with Jesus first. Really. Truly. To give Him everything about you. Not to keep anything back – regarding life, love, boys, men, thoughts, heart. A girl’s first love had to be Jesus. A boy’s first love had to be Jesus. We went to a Rock the Universe concert and I listened to Nicole C Mullen tell us about how Jesus had to be our first and primary love. For all of our life; single and married, we had to constantly be “chasing” after Jesus. I realized that I was trying to keep control on my future and needed to surrender everything about my future to Jesus.

That was my final conscious dating decision: I decided I would always be a woman chasing after Jesus; that I would love Him foremost and that my future husband would love Jesus first as well. Jesus is my first love.

I learned that the term “missionary dating” was a huge thing for young girls. They seemed to think that by dating a non-Christian they were doing a good thing. I studied with them and we learned that the Bible clearly says being unequally yoked (aka a non-Christian and a Christian) does not work with God’s plan.

Basically there is one rule for Christians in marriage from Jesus and it is really simple: Ready?

Men: marry a woman who love Jesus.

Women: marry a man who loves Jesus.

There isn’t a “wrong one” if they love Jesus, there is only a “wrong first love.”

Jesus should be our first love. We should allow Him to hold our heart safe (the Bible calls it “protected by a hedge”) and wait on Him. If the person we are dating loves Jesus first, they will know how to love us. If we love Jesus, we will know how to love them.

We don’t obey Jesus out of fear, but out of love. As a Christian, we choose to avoid sin because we know sin breaks God’s heart and our passion is to serve Him with love. I wasn’t truly saving my purity for my future husband – I was obeying Jesus and His design because I loved Him. That should have been my first focus. Once I truly understood that my obedience with my body was because I loved Jesus it was liberating! I was understanding that God made sex in His perfect design and that within His rules, it was something to be looked forward to. (Honestly, at 18, I was still at the point where I thought “it” was super gross… dorky, I know.) It became less about rules and more about love.

“I am saving myself for my future husband because I love Jesus and He says it is the way.”

Once I wrote that in my journal, so much of the teenage garbage and pressures from everyone around me seemed to melt. It was perfectly okay to be a virgin adult. (Did I write that? Yep. I had so many from many age groups laugh at me and even my sisters teased me because I had what they called “virgin lips.”)

I was a few days from 19, still never been on a date, when I went to my Daddy’s family reunion in Georgia. Every one of my cousins and my siblings in their teen years had been on a date; most over 14 had already kissed. It was super laughter day for them. I loved that day. I loved now being able to witness to kids my age or younger about Jesus’ love just because they couldn’t believe I was wearing a ring on my wedding ring finger to remind me that my heart belonged first to Jesus.

It became a witness goal for me. Jesus used that tiny band for me to talk to so many young people during this season of my life. Most laughed. Almost all of them laughed. But I found myself praying for them and maybe my words helped a few.

We moved within Saint Augustine and started going to a new church. This was the first place I didn’t immediately jump into helping. I was almost 19 and still didn’t have a license. Instead I found myself trying to make friends. I wanted people with whom I could share life. I never wanted to leave the place called Saint Augustine. I had found a place my heart loved. I felt Jesus telling me this would be my home.

Fast forward 20 years:

I did leave dating and marriage and family up to Jesus. (Yes, stayed in Saint Augustine area.) I married a man who also loves Jesus first. We continually learn and love Jesus more and learn and love each other more – our relationship started with each of our first dates. In the world’s eyes, we were each other’s first loves. Really, Jesus was and is the first love for both of us. We loved Jesus with our bodies and futures. We each respected the other enough to wait until we were married. We didn’t “try it out” first. (BTW; Our chemistry is just fine!) We will celebrate our 18th wedding anniversary in November. In November 2052, we will celebrate our 50th. We are in this for the long run. Our focus is on Jesus in our love and marriage as it should be in all things.

My constant prayer is that people realize that their sexuality is not divorced from their spirituality. God made us complete. Just like our physical hunger shouldn’t make us decide we need to eat unhealthy things, our sexual hunger shouldn’t make us decide to do unhealthy things. Our ability to control the natural hungers or desires within us is what proves we are free. One can only be 100% free by giving everything to Jesus.

My story is uniquely mine as yours is uniquely yours.

My story is the tale of a girl discovering her self through Jesus. It is the story of a woman continually choosing to follow Jesus every day and in each decision. Often, I fail. I fall out of focus and instead let the negative self-image that my mind sees try to convince me that I’m worthless. Jesus says we are loved. Bought with the price of His blood from the slave market of sin – all sins. He knows the innermost parts of our mind, heart, and soul and still loves us! Nothing is too bad that makes us unloved by Jesus. He reaches out His hand so we can choose to charge our life in big ways and small ways and continually choose to live our life to show people Jesus through our actions; they will know us by our love.

I choose to focus on Jesus. I choose to focus on my first love. Through Him, and only through Him, am I able to show the love for myself, my husband, my family, and others around me in a way that reflects Jesus.

Thank you for reading!

~Nancy Tart

Wonder and Amazement

August 8, 2020

Wonder and Amazement

“Mom,” this was in a very contemplative tone like Pooh Bear thinking, “do you think God ever gets sad because people don’t like themselves?”

I’m pretty sure he does. Her pause wasn’t enough to answer.

“God worked so hard on each of us to make us special. Why does the devil make us think we aren’t beautiful?”

Wow.

Unpack that one as a Mom. …as a woman…

We are each fearfully and wonderfully made. God knit each of us together while we were in our mother’s womb. Jesus died for each of us.

We know these things, yet why does our inner voice always seem to tell us we are not special, not important, not valuable? Often it is our own inner voice that says this to us. Honestly, our culture of appearing perfect and surface relationships may contribute to this; who are we kidding? It does. Yet this type of self-loathing has been around since the beginning. The Bible constantly reminds us that we are made in God’s image, that He loves us, that he set ways for each of our unique paths…

Imagine you create a labor of love – maybe a crocheted blanket, handmade dress, birdhouse, special card, meal, it could be anything – and the person you give it to throws it away in your face. “It’s ugly.”

Imagine you child looks at you with a tear-stained face and says, “I’m ugly.” Your heart breaks.

That is what God sees.

Why does the devil want us to not like ourselves? Easy answer. He wants to destroy. If we see ourselves as less, incapable, and unimportant we will not try to accomplish what God wants for us. That is what the devil wants. That is why he whispers to our hearts lies about us. You are ugly, unimportant, unloved, weak, incapable…

If you hear this… Shut it down! You are loved! Jesus died for you! He created your special character and loves every part of you! Anything telling you that you are unwanted is a lie.

Yes, daughter, you are loved always.

People may fail you.

Jobs, scholarships, schools may not want you; may choose against you.

Circumstances may try to swallow you.

But. You. Are. Always. Loved.

You have been created with an amazing purpose and a wonderful set of amazing unique qualities that fit perfect for what you were made for. This is the truth.

Encourage others! Encourage yourself!

Type at you later!

~Nancy Tart

Culture: The Importance of Family

May 10, 2020

Culture: The Importance of Family

Imagine you are raised a young woman, married a few years with two children. Your family is part of a group sojourning in a land with people hostile to you. In your family’s culture, women are to obey their fathers and later husbands. You and your husband love God. You honor His law. Then you hear at the well that the midwives are commanded by the king to destroy all male babies of your people as the baby is being born. But you hear how two of your midwife friends fear God over the king and so being, do not obey him. Yet you are scared for your people.

You find yourself encouraging and helping; but the fear is everywhere. Women are praying their children are girls so they are not required to kill them.

You find yourself pregnant. Part of your heart wrestles the fear – should you pray this child is a girl? Your husband smiles and whispers, “we fear God, the child is a gift.” But you hope that stays true even after the child is born. Your daughter and son see the fear in the people and look to you for comfort. They look for assurance that you live by the faith you speak of; do you fear for your baby or trust in God? You smile and tell them, “God has given us this child, God will keep the child safe.”

But you wonder. Death and affliction are around you. The rulers hate your people. Many of your friends have faced death and the shroud of death for defying the king expands to all in their household – or so the stories say. At least twice you have known it was truth. Would you risk the lives of your husband, son, and daughter for the baby if it is a boy? Which is safer? But the rumblings of the little person growing inside you remind you as you wrap your arms around your swelling belly that this child is worth the risk. God’s gifts are always worth the risk.

When the day comes and you labour with your own instead of calling the midwives, you birth the beautiful child whose lovely eyes catch away your breath as you stare and study him. Him. Yes, your daughter says “I have a baby brother!” and your husband hugs you and the newborn tight. Your son glances up at you to look in your eyes. You are not afraid. You will risk everything for this love. “We will keep him hidden.” Your husband smiles. Your son and daughter relax in their trust of you as they see you trust in God.

But you know there will come a time when your tiny illegal child will be too loud. Someone will know, someone will tell, and there must be a way.

You are learned as your family teaches even your daughters to read and think; you know that your afflictors bow before idols. One is the god of the river, Hapi, and you know that women wishing to be fertile yet cursed with barren wombs go and bathe at one place. Also, the wealthy do not nurse their own offspring, instead they hire a nurse for the child. You begin to watch. Daily you go with your daughter in tow under the guise of fetching water and food yet along the way you see the women who come to the water. They all wish for children; the longing in their hearts and souls are deep. Their sorrow causes tears to rise in your eyes. It also waters the plan you have devised.

Your husband does not agree quickly, for him it is a horrid idea to turn his child, his beautiful gift from God, over to some heathen woman regardless of whether it may save the child’s life. How can you think of killing our son’s soul in this way? But it is your daughter who says, “but Father, what if they chose Mother as his nurse?” and this you both continue to discuss and pray about.

The time comes when he is too big to hide anymore. His tender hunger cries have turned into the periodic wails of teething, striking without warning and so loud you fear his voice will call soldiers from every corner of the globe. Now, you set him adrift in the basket of woven reeds and pitch you have carefully crafted, and carefully place it among the reeds to drift into the part of the river where the barren women come to bathe. Your daughter stays as a guard. You leave to pray.

This is the sorrow, trust, and faith of Jocebed, wife of Amram and mother to Aaron, Miriam, and Moses. She placed her trust in God and brought an illegal child into the world, hiding him from those who would kill him. She watched, waited, and used the heathen culture of her people’s enemies against them.

We know the rest; the pharaoh’s daughter comes to bathe and finds Moses. He cries and she takes pity on him, knowing he was a Hebrew! A girl appears and says, “may I fetch you a nurse to suck your baby?” and this educated woman of Egypt says, “yes.” Do you think she didn’t know this nurse would be the child’s mother? Wow. Just to imagine these three women and the things they chose to do… Jocebed in faith and love, Miriam in obedience, faith, and love, and Pharaoh’s daughter in love and pity of a child who she took into her home in defiance of her father’s order.

Just some thoughts.

I know that most of us spend today thinking about our mothers. Not to say I don’t! But I love to step into the shoes of those before. I love to try to see their struggles – how powerful Jocabed’s faith! Not only to give birth and refuse to destroy her boy, but to give that little gift in faith to another believing that God will allow her rather devious plan to work trusting her family can pass their faith on to this child in the short amount of time they will have him (while she nurses him).

Wow.

Think about the various challenges we mothers face at different points in history, through various cultures, and in various strata of existence. All of our stories are different, but the theme of faith, love, and hope permeate them all. We all want the best for our gifts and pray to effectively train them up in the little time we have them.

Give thanks for the mothers and grandmothers and motherly influences in your life.

Thank you, God, for mothers!

Thank you for Reading,

~Nancy Tart

And… It Happened!

Look out world! Here comes a full confident young woman who continually amazes her family! #ProudParent #WeLoveYou

And… IT Happened!

January 9, 2020

I am at work, minding my own business, trying to focus solely on work.

*BLING* No noise, though, because my phone is on silent like it should be.

I glance at it laying on the desk.

WHAT!

“Mom, which day is good for University tour? I need it for my scholarship application next year.”

I reread that with bugged out eyes.

Yes, next year. Like, application to be delivered in the beginning of fall 2020. Where did time run?

Fast forward to the day before said university tour date (I’ve already asked for the day off months ago & am really excited about visiting this place!).

*BLING*

Um… Really? It’s lunch, though (oddly she seems to understand the no-phones-during-work concept already), so I look.

I get a picture… it’s an outline of our entire day, which not only includes the long drive, university tour, campus discussion, and such, but also squeezes in “appointment at DMV.”

Wait. What appointment? It’s Jaquline’s 10th birthday – my mind instantly pops to Kimberly and Jaquline’s open request for their FL IDs. Nope. Three dots (means she’s typing another text) pop up…

“Oh, that’s because 01/07 is when I can get my real driver’s license & I already booked the appointment so we will just make it if there’s traffic.”

I laugh out loud.

I could say impressed, but I’m not really. I know my young woman very well. She knows that if she wants something, she has to set it all up and make it happen. Expecially since I’ve been working full-time now, all of the girls have become far more independent. Before it was my policy that if they wanted something (plan an outing, attend an event, join a club/group, get a job, etc.) that wasn’t a family thing, I would help research and direct, but they had to do the paperwork, calling, or whatever else that had to be done. Now, though, my free time at home is taken up with the younglings doing really basic stuff like verifying schoolwork, going over new concepts again, attempting to train basic manners and such in two of three hours without feeling like a joy-leech (more on that to come later), and other such. Sometimes I feel like I never get to talk to my teens & preteen.

Driving them places was my only dedicated time to talk with them… I’m not sure I want her to have her license…

Nothing is going to slow her down.

I love that she’s so independent and self-reliant. I love that she has goals and makes things happen to reach them.

…I’ve been in thought too long, the three dots come back…

“It shouldn’t take too long. I made an appointment.”

So I send a smiley face. (I didn’t even realize the DMV was open that late)

*Pause for the tour… and the sweet story of this picture!*

The above picture was her grabbing a “quick selfie” with me as Dad stopped for his breakfast after the tour – “we have to have one picture from the tour with both of us!” (My heart almost melted, I had several pictures of her, just none of me... she meant she wanted a picture with me.)

Fast forward to January 7th, and I’m typing on a blog after driving Christina to her appointment. I’m waiting for my sixteen year old to get back from her test. She’s about to step into a new level of independence.

I’m not really scared – though most people say I should be.

I trust that she’s learned well. I trust that she will make safe, wise decisions. Mostly, this peace I’m carrying is because I know regardless of what I want, I can only hold her hand for so long – I have to let her grow. I let her go into God’s hands… back into God’s hands, actually. Not that she ever left His care, just that he entrusted Louis & I with her for a while. A few short years in the span of life… we get to hold, love on, teach, and enjoy our younglings as they learn in a safe, protected environment.

The ultimate test is what they do once they leave.

I see her trying to hide her excitement – CAP has taught her that – as she comes back in. She needs me to come to the agent’s window. I smile as I mentally ask myself, “is this the last time I’ll need to sign something for her to give permission?” (She’s not 18, so silly question, but that’s what my mind says to me.)

She passed (no, I’m not surprised) and we drive home. I tease her that I could take a nap in the backseat now.

Someone asked me, “aren’t you worried about her driving the interstate after…?” They didn’t complete it but my head did, “…you just lost Mary there.”

No. “Why not?”

I asked myself the same thing as Kimberly and Christina loaded up in “Old Blue” (her name for her car) in their ABUs and my oldest and preteen drove out on their first solo drive. “Why aren’t you worried?” – and I give myself the same answer I gave that person, “Jesus is in charge of my heart and hers.”

I’m secretly thrilled beyond measure of the whole university experience she will launch into next year. I’m excited for her getting to drive at 16 (I was 19 when I got my first driver’s license). I’m so proud of her I sometimes feel my heart might bust. And this is just the beginning… New stage, for me and for Christina.

This year, 2020, has already seen my first university tour (Christina), first fully licensed driver (Christina), and Kimberly’s first long trip away from home. 2020 will include: oldest trio’s first summer camp together, Christina’s first solo flight, Lucas’ starting kindergarten, Becky’s learner’s permit, and Kimberly’s Vyteen account. By their plans; Kimberly wants to take the PERT, Jaquline & Kimberly plan to be team gymnasts, Kimberly wants to be C/Sgt before summer… and those are just the ones I currently know about… I’m blessed to be their mom. I’m super excited for them.

Jesus is in charge of my heart and theirs. I have a peace as they grow that some people just don’t understand… but my joy in their achievements is something everyone can relate to!

Type at you later,

~Nancy Tart

Two Cadet Homecoming

January 7, 2020

Two Cadet Homecoming!

On January 4th, a beautiful day with misty rainshowers threatening the gorgeous parade ground at Camp Blanding, I watched both of my cadets march in their pass and review (ceremony parade at the end of the 2019-2020 winter encampment).  I almost cried two years ago when it was just Christina.  As I watched this day, I was overwhelmed with pride and a bit of anxiety.

Kimberly, short blondie (about middle in each picture); in her barracks, AF Blues, ABUs

Kimberly is twelve.  My spunky little fireball has taken her future by the horns the last two semesters and spent her twelfth birthday, as she’d planned it for almost two years, attending her first Civil Air Patrol meeting as a cadet.  I’m not sure Mom (me!) is ready for her to take on so much independence just yet.  I’m missing my snuggly, grinning, dog-wrestling toddler who used Sheba as a pillow-pet before we knew those toys existed.

Christina was OIC of food services. (In English, your know, civie-speak, please?)  That means she was the basically the kitchen manager for encampment.  I’m sure it was far more detailed and with at least some oversight, but that’s the break-down bare-bones version of her staff role this time.  I’m sure, based on these pictures, that she is fairly comfortable giving orders.

Christina is far left in both pictures. Winter Encampment 2019/2020

Moments like this both amaze me and, honestly, almost scare me. 

How can my babies be so mature already?

How did 16 and 12 years flash by?

Life goes by so quickly.  I’ve learned to just release and enjoy.  Watch them grow and smile as they fly.  I love learning the young women they are becoming!  Thank you, Jesus, for the opportunity to be a mom.  Thank you for Christina and Kimberly and for the time I’ve had with them.  I pray for them daily.

I pray as they soar.  I pray they keep their eyes on you, Jesus, reach for the stars, determine to achieve what appears impossible, and reach down to help others on their climb. 

I’m sure that’s just the misty rain in my face… or are those bits of joyful tears? 

Parade is done, rain begins to fall, and we wait in the van for the cadets to change into civies for the trip home.

“Freedom!” yelps the stranger with a bag; “Mom, no pictures,” but she smiles anyway.

Now I get to hear their challenges, thrills, new experiences, friends, and new goals they’ve faced and discovered on the long ride home.  Homecomings.  I am beginning to understand my parents’ tears on our Christmas surprise (when almost all of us showed up together!)…

Type at you next time,

~Nancy Tart

Follow me!

Get my latest posts delivered to your email: