Thankfulness 2022

This year it may be a little premature, but I’m super excited about the amazing things. #Thankful #Gratitude #PensacolaChristianCollege #EmbryRiddleAeronauticalUniversity #LifeJourney #Children #GoodNewsChurch #WGVGymnastics #Education #Thankfulness

Thankfulness 2022

September 27, 2022

Each year I try to reflect on what God has done in our lives this past year. 

This year it may be a little premature, but I’m super excited about the amazing things.  I love to brag on what God has done!

I’ve been working for WGV Gymnastics (dream job I wanted my whole life but didn’t know it).  Louis is coming up on two years of working for Heritage Funeral Home.  I am super thankful for our Christian work environments and Christian bosses. 

Christina is happily pursuing her dream with passion, determination, and enthusiasm.  She is still at Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University full time, working at WGV Gymnastics part-time, and babysitting, dogsitting, and housesitting on the side.  She is an amazing big sister!  Her little gymnasts love her!  She serves in the nursery at Good News Church at least three times a month and loves “her babies” – yes, they become hers for an hour or so.  I am so thankful for Christina!

Becky has thrown some shocking curveballs at us and is away at Pensacola Christian College.  Same state, yes, but an hour earlier in time than we are.  (Different time zone, as she’s under Alabama on the panhandle – Lucas and Thea point out on the big map on the wall at church every morning when we get their lemon tea “there’s Becky!”) I am so proud of her!  She’s exploring and learning and growing – such an amazing young lady I am so blessed to be her mom!  Thank you, Jesus, for Becky!

Kimberly can legally drive… (REALLY???  I can’t believe she’s 15!)  She’s learning so much in schoolwork academically, in gymnastics physically, and in life with maturity as she grows and takes on so much responsibility!  Kimberly’s plans are impressive.  Her determination is a trait so many people comment on to me – as a youngling, it was labeled stubbornness, but now that she knows how to focus, it’s determination.  Kimberly is a competitive gymnast at WGV Gymnastics, a gymnastics coach part-time at WGV Gymnastics, serves in kid’s ministry at Good News Church at least twice a month, and dogsits occasionally.  (She is working toward her claimed goals of saving for a computer for college this spring and a car next fall.)  I am so thankful for Kimberly!

Jaquline is Christina’s twin.  Sometimes Christina’s gymnasts see Jaquline and give her hugs saying “hi! Coach!” which makes Jaquline smile proudly and Christina jealous.  “You’re stealing my hugs!” Christina has been known to say later.  Jaquline has grown in her relationship with Jesus so much in the last year.  She serves in the church nursery at least twice a month.  She occasionally volunteers at WGV – or works cleaning to “get Christina out faster.”  Jaquline continues to work toward her goal of team gymnast someday – she loves Beam and said she wished there was a Beam only competition.  Thank you, Jesus, for Jaquline!

Jillian is facing the challenges that come with entering double digits.  The want of being treated as an adult yet the want of continuing childish foolishness.  She’s maneuvering that with the cornerstone of knowing that Jesus can lead her through anything.  She loves her kid’s ministry leaders at Good News Church.  She loves her coaches at WGV Gymnastics (she’s a competitive gymnast).  She loves her friends and I see her making some lifelong friendships, if she can hold them.  She is leaping forward in academics!  I am so thankful for Jillian!

Lucas is an unstoppable force of limitless energy!  He is always running a one-man football game where he is the quarterback, receiver, kicker, lineman, and fullback all at the same time.  When he catches his own forward pass, I’ll have seen everything.  He begs me for a brother almost every day.  He is super thankful for his “gym brothers” and his “best friends.”  I am super thankful for these young boys and young men God has set around Lucas to help him enjoy being a little boy and slowly teach him how to be a young man.  Lucas gives 110% to everything he touches.  His passion and enthusiasm will help fuel his discovery stages as he grows.  He loves gymnastics.  He loves being strong.  He loves mud and football and big trucks and being like dad.  Thank you, Jesus, for Lucas!

Theadora is no longer the baby.  She is a “big girl” or a “young lady” all the time.  Though she loves snuggling (I’m so glad she hasn’t grown out of that yet), she is quick to say “I’ll do it myself!” and proceed to do just that.  Theadora has a bold confidence that comes from running the gym at the age of two.  She doesn’t care to keep up pretences, what you see is what you get – at times like that I think of her as “Becky junior.”  This confidence and determination will carry her far.  She “signs her name” as TTT and says, “see, I’m triple T,” they are left all over Coach Heather’s desk as “swips” for Coach Heather along with who-knows-what-it-should be doodles.  I am so thankful for Theadora!

I love the stage God has us in!  I’m so thankful to be here and alive and enjoying every minute of our time together and apart.  I love our family.  I’m so grateful to see our younglings grow and become young women (and eventually, a young man)!  Thank you, Jesus, for the honor of giving life and raising children!  I’m so overwhelmed with gratitude to you, Jesus, for my totally amazing family!

Thank you for reading.

Type at you next time,

~Nancy Tart

Stretching Her Eagles’ Wings

Enjoy each moment! We know our children are “on loan” from God for a little while & then they take flight! Enjoy this adventure, Becky!

Stretching Her Eagles’ Wings

August 28, 2022

Part of our educational philosophy is never to hold anyone back.  That is sometimes the hardest part of being a homeschool mom, at least for me. 

Friday, Christina, Louis, Thea, and I drove Becky to Pensacola Christian College for the start of her next level.

The car trip was fun.  Louis and Christina kept playing songs Becky likes and saying, “oops, that’s not classical or hymns” which made everyone laugh and several discussions of songs and lyrics and morality erupt.  We didn’t stop as often for potty or snack breaks as Louis thought we’d have to (Thea was too entertained with her big sisters and Christina, Thea, and I packed a bunch of snacks). 

The campus was huge and iconic.  Beautiful brick and magnificent stately trees reflected tradition and integration.  I’m a bit nerdy; I loved the architecture and old fashioned style.  Everything was electronic though!  I had received an email asking for a physical copy of a specific document – and being leery of electronic access as I am, I brought the actual paper.  Didn’t need it.  The electronic version of the printed paper in my purse “transferred” perfectly from St Johns River without a thing from me.  As Becky’s “authorized parent,” I was able to load into a portal on my phone that allowed me access to maps, her mailbox information, orientation information, even schedules and everything as if I were the student – Becky said it was creepy, I thought it was cool!

After crossing off the seven things (five on the “welcome” list, but with Becky under eighteen there were two paperwork drop offs and as she’s in the work program, she had a task for that as well) Becky had to do and being as much help (okay, Becky would call it hindrance) as possible, we decided (not precisely accurate, Louis decided) to go have a late lunch together just off campus. 

Someone likes Becky’s new spot!

Mellow Mushroom.  In Pensacola?  I thought the one on Anastasia Island was the only…  oops.

Finally, I ended up with a picture of my college girls.  They thought it cool because both are Eagles and blue & gold & white.  (Kimberly got in on that because she took her SAT at Pedro Menendez High School so she considers herself a “Falcon” and even has a Pedro Menendez Vystar card!  She pulled it out and showed them the blue & yellow colors – “A falcon is a type of eagle” Kimberly claims.)  Becky laughed because she and Kimberly plan on being Gators when they head for their Masters & Doctorate.  (“trading the gold for orange” they claim) Remember that mustard yellow skirt?  Becky’s pairing it with her beautiful navy blue blouse turns her outfit into her college colors!

I’ve been listening a lot to college plans since we encourage studying the path to what they want to do and finding various ways to access that final goal.  There was a lot of path and plan discussion on that road trip. 

I’m so proud of Becky for taking flight!  I pray she has a wonderful experience and learns a lot.  I pray she makes friends and connections that will last a lifetime!  I pray she does her best.  Her best right now is amazing me.  I’m truly excited for her entering this stage. 

Thank you, Jesus, for making it possible for us to help our children pursue their dreams!  Thank you that each of them wants to help the other.  Thank you that each wants to invest in their own education by working for it both financially and mentally.  I’m so thankful for the blessing of Becky in my life!  Thank you, Jesus, for allowing me the honor of being her mother! 

As I’m driving back home, chatting with Christina as Thea and Louis sleep in the back, I think on how parents only really get to father or mother their children for a few years – they are on loan from God anyway as all of them are God’s children entrusted to us.   “21 years” by TobyMac came on the radio followed by “Cinderella” by Stephen Curtis Chapman… God knows how music touches me.  One bit in the “21 years” song that makes me smile is “21 years, what a beautiful loan,” (I thank you Jesus, for trusting us and “loaning” Becky – and the others, but this thought was really about Becky – to us) and in “Cinderella” the bit is “but I know something the prince never knew,” [meaning they grow up and go] and yes, girls become young women, make their own decisions, and I pray mine know they can still talk to me about anything. 

Enjoy your “loans” with your littles!  Enjoy every bit you can.  God has trusted us with training and raising His beautiful children!  Just like I love watching “my little gymnasts” (those I’ve coached, usually as preschoolers) as they rise, I love watching my girls become young ladies. 

I love you, Becky!  Let your light shine!  Enjoy this adventure called life!  Every day is a gift from God; that’s why it’s called the present!

Thank you for reading.

Type at you later,

~Nancy Tart

Dating Decisions – Part 4

Dating Decision Part 4: Dissecting Real Life and True Love #DatingDecision #Decision #Dating #Focus #Choice #Purity #Liberating #Saving #Love #Understanding #Choices #Allow #Marry #Marriage

September 23, 2020

Dating Decisions Part 4

If you’ve kept with this series so far, you know I’m almost 18 in the story now. I’ve been studying myself, trying to shift my focus to Jesus and become the woman I know He wants me to be. I’ve been people watching everyone. I am still very shy around my peers. I am only comfortable talking about dreams and hopes and principles; not very good at small talk. I die after “I’m good, how are you?” But ask my opinion on something and you get more than you wanted. I am a good listener. I sort people into boxes depending on what they tell me: mental boxes labeled, “stay away,” “like to be friends,” “want to learn more from,” and “never in a million years.”

I hit 18.5, had gone out to Disney Springs with several friends from work twice (which my Daddy fully encouraged and wanted to know if we’d met any guys… no, we goofed off, went to a comedy show, watched the two oldest drink “Monkey Brains” from a monkey-head mug and get sillier by the second, sang along with a band, people watched, danced line dances at the country bar, and did cartwheels on the AMC stars waiting for my mom & the two other younger friend’s rides). After relaying this to my Daddy, he shook his head and said, “that sounds like ten year olds instead of adults!” I grinned, “but it sounds like friends hanging out in your stories.” Yes. I was crazy.

I was working at Disney and during the few lunch breaks I took, I joined the two other girls who claimed to be Christ-followers and we encouraged each other. It shocked me. Of all who asked me out there, every one of the “boys” (I refused to call them men per my Daddy’s earlier definition) expected a date to end with sex. No. No dating for me. At 18, getting a little bolder, I had started wearing a silver ring with my birthstone that my Daddy had given me a few years back for a birthday gift. I told anyone who asked me out that it was my virginity ring and a symbol of the vow I made to save myself for my future husband. That kept a few of the nicer “boys” from trying to ask me out. One named Guy said, “awesome, sister!” overhearing my spiel and encouraged with, “keep it up.” No, he didn’t ask me out; none of the few single “men” I met asked me out at this point.

The most important step in my dating decisions came when I left Kissimmee. I moved the last time with my parents (told my Daddy, “just one more time.”) and once in Saint Augustine I became an assistant in our youth group. I saw so much sadness and pain in the preteen girls I tried to mentor. This was the first time I agreed to help out with teaching youth. I prayed for each girl by name.

I discovered that the most important part of any girl’s life was to fall in love with Jesus first. Really. Truly. To give Him everything about you. Not to keep anything back – regarding life, love, boys, men, thoughts, heart. A girl’s first love had to be Jesus. A boy’s first love had to be Jesus. We went to a Rock the Universe concert and I listened to Nicole C Mullen tell us about how Jesus had to be our first and primary love. For all of our life; single and married, we had to constantly be “chasing” after Jesus. I realized that I was trying to keep control on my future and needed to surrender everything about my future to Jesus.

That was my final conscious dating decision: I decided I would always be a woman chasing after Jesus; that I would love Him foremost and that my future husband would love Jesus first as well. Jesus is my first love.

I learned that the term “missionary dating” was a huge thing for young girls. They seemed to think that by dating a non-Christian they were doing a good thing. I studied with them and we learned that the Bible clearly says being unequally yoked (aka a non-Christian and a Christian) does not work with God’s plan.

Basically there is one rule for Christians in marriage from Jesus and it is really simple: Ready?

Men: marry a woman who love Jesus.

Women: marry a man who loves Jesus.

There isn’t a “wrong one” if they love Jesus, there is only a “wrong first love.”

Jesus should be our first love. We should allow Him to hold our heart safe (the Bible calls it “protected by a hedge”) and wait on Him. If the person we are dating loves Jesus first, they will know how to love us. If we love Jesus, we will know how to love them.

We don’t obey Jesus out of fear, but out of love. As a Christian, we choose to avoid sin because we know sin breaks God’s heart and our passion is to serve Him with love. I wasn’t truly saving my purity for my future husband – I was obeying Jesus and His design because I loved Him. That should have been my first focus. Once I truly understood that my obedience with my body was because I loved Jesus it was liberating! I was understanding that God made sex in His perfect design and that within His rules, it was something to be looked forward to. (Honestly, at 18, I was still at the point where I thought “it” was super gross… dorky, I know.) It became less about rules and more about love.

“I am saving myself for my future husband because I love Jesus and He says it is the way.”

Once I wrote that in my journal, so much of the teenage garbage and pressures from everyone around me seemed to melt. It was perfectly okay to be a virgin adult. (Did I write that? Yep. I had so many from many age groups laugh at me and even my sisters teased me because I had what they called “virgin lips.”)

I was a few days from 19, still never been on a date, when I went to my Daddy’s family reunion in Georgia. Every one of my cousins and my siblings in their teen years had been on a date; most over 14 had already kissed. It was super laughter day for them. I loved that day. I loved now being able to witness to kids my age or younger about Jesus’ love just because they couldn’t believe I was wearing a ring on my wedding ring finger to remind me that my heart belonged first to Jesus.

It became a witness goal for me. Jesus used that tiny band for me to talk to so many young people during this season of my life. Most laughed. Almost all of them laughed. But I found myself praying for them and maybe my words helped a few.

We moved within Saint Augustine and started going to a new church. This was the first place I didn’t immediately jump into helping. I was almost 19 and still didn’t have a license. Instead I found myself trying to make friends. I wanted people with whom I could share life. I never wanted to leave the place called Saint Augustine. I had found a place my heart loved. I felt Jesus telling me this would be my home.

Fast forward 20 years:

I did leave dating and marriage and family up to Jesus. (Yes, stayed in Saint Augustine area.) I married a man who also loves Jesus first. We continually learn and love Jesus more and learn and love each other more – our relationship started with each of our first dates. In the world’s eyes, we were each other’s first loves. Really, Jesus was and is the first love for both of us. We loved Jesus with our bodies and futures. We each respected the other enough to wait until we were married. We didn’t “try it out” first. (BTW; Our chemistry is just fine!) We will celebrate our 18th wedding anniversary in November. In November 2052, we will celebrate our 50th. We are in this for the long run. Our focus is on Jesus in our love and marriage as it should be in all things.

My constant prayer is that people realize that their sexuality is not divorced from their spirituality. God made us complete. Just like our physical hunger shouldn’t make us decide we need to eat unhealthy things, our sexual hunger shouldn’t make us decide to do unhealthy things. Our ability to control the natural hungers or desires within us is what proves we are free. One can only be 100% free by giving everything to Jesus.

My story is uniquely mine as yours is uniquely yours.

My story is the tale of a girl discovering her self through Jesus. It is the story of a woman continually choosing to follow Jesus every day and in each decision. Often, I fail. I fall out of focus and instead let the negative self-image that my mind sees try to convince me that I’m worthless. Jesus says we are loved. Bought with the price of His blood from the slave market of sin – all sins. He knows the innermost parts of our mind, heart, and soul and still loves us! Nothing is too bad that makes us unloved by Jesus. He reaches out His hand so we can choose to charge our life in big ways and small ways and continually choose to live our life to show people Jesus through our actions; they will know us by our love.

I choose to focus on Jesus. I choose to focus on my first love. Through Him, and only through Him, am I able to show the love for myself, my husband, my family, and others around me in a way that reflects Jesus.

Thank you for reading!

~Nancy Tart

And… It Happened!

Look out world! Here comes a full confident young woman who continually amazes her family! #ProudParent #WeLoveYou

And… IT Happened!

January 9, 2020

I am at work, minding my own business, trying to focus solely on work.

*BLING* No noise, though, because my phone is on silent like it should be.

I glance at it laying on the desk.

WHAT!

“Mom, which day is good for University tour? I need it for my scholarship application next year.”

I reread that with bugged out eyes.

Yes, next year. Like, application to be delivered in the beginning of fall 2020. Where did time run?

Fast forward to the day before said university tour date (I’ve already asked for the day off months ago & am really excited about visiting this place!).

*BLING*

Um… Really? It’s lunch, though (oddly she seems to understand the no-phones-during-work concept already), so I look.

I get a picture… it’s an outline of our entire day, which not only includes the long drive, university tour, campus discussion, and such, but also squeezes in “appointment at DMV.”

Wait. What appointment? It’s Jaquline’s 10th birthday – my mind instantly pops to Kimberly and Jaquline’s open request for their FL IDs. Nope. Three dots (means she’s typing another text) pop up…

“Oh, that’s because 01/07 is when I can get my real driver’s license & I already booked the appointment so we will just make it if there’s traffic.”

I laugh out loud.

I could say impressed, but I’m not really. I know my young woman very well. She knows that if she wants something, she has to set it all up and make it happen. Expecially since I’ve been working full-time now, all of the girls have become far more independent. Before it was my policy that if they wanted something (plan an outing, attend an event, join a club/group, get a job, etc.) that wasn’t a family thing, I would help research and direct, but they had to do the paperwork, calling, or whatever else that had to be done. Now, though, my free time at home is taken up with the younglings doing really basic stuff like verifying schoolwork, going over new concepts again, attempting to train basic manners and such in two of three hours without feeling like a joy-leech (more on that to come later), and other such. Sometimes I feel like I never get to talk to my teens & preteen.

Driving them places was my only dedicated time to talk with them… I’m not sure I want her to have her license…

Nothing is going to slow her down.

I love that she’s so independent and self-reliant. I love that she has goals and makes things happen to reach them.

…I’ve been in thought too long, the three dots come back…

“It shouldn’t take too long. I made an appointment.”

So I send a smiley face. (I didn’t even realize the DMV was open that late)

*Pause for the tour… and the sweet story of this picture!*

The above picture was her grabbing a “quick selfie” with me as Dad stopped for his breakfast after the tour – “we have to have one picture from the tour with both of us!” (My heart almost melted, I had several pictures of her, just none of me... she meant she wanted a picture with me.)

Fast forward to January 7th, and I’m typing on a blog after driving Christina to her appointment. I’m waiting for my sixteen year old to get back from her test. She’s about to step into a new level of independence.

I’m not really scared – though most people say I should be.

I trust that she’s learned well. I trust that she will make safe, wise decisions. Mostly, this peace I’m carrying is because I know regardless of what I want, I can only hold her hand for so long – I have to let her grow. I let her go into God’s hands… back into God’s hands, actually. Not that she ever left His care, just that he entrusted Louis & I with her for a while. A few short years in the span of life… we get to hold, love on, teach, and enjoy our younglings as they learn in a safe, protected environment.

The ultimate test is what they do once they leave.

I see her trying to hide her excitement – CAP has taught her that – as she comes back in. She needs me to come to the agent’s window. I smile as I mentally ask myself, “is this the last time I’ll need to sign something for her to give permission?” (She’s not 18, so silly question, but that’s what my mind says to me.)

She passed (no, I’m not surprised) and we drive home. I tease her that I could take a nap in the backseat now.

Someone asked me, “aren’t you worried about her driving the interstate after…?” They didn’t complete it but my head did, “…you just lost Mary there.”

No. “Why not?”

I asked myself the same thing as Kimberly and Christina loaded up in “Old Blue” (her name for her car) in their ABUs and my oldest and preteen drove out on their first solo drive. “Why aren’t you worried?” – and I give myself the same answer I gave that person, “Jesus is in charge of my heart and hers.”

I’m secretly thrilled beyond measure of the whole university experience she will launch into next year. I’m excited for her getting to drive at 16 (I was 19 when I got my first driver’s license). I’m so proud of her I sometimes feel my heart might bust. And this is just the beginning… New stage, for me and for Christina.

This year, 2020, has already seen my first university tour (Christina), first fully licensed driver (Christina), and Kimberly’s first long trip away from home. 2020 will include: oldest trio’s first summer camp together, Christina’s first solo flight, Lucas’ starting kindergarten, Becky’s learner’s permit, and Kimberly’s Vyteen account. By their plans; Kimberly wants to take the PERT, Jaquline & Kimberly plan to be team gymnasts, Kimberly wants to be C/Sgt before summer… and those are just the ones I currently know about… I’m blessed to be their mom. I’m super excited for them.

Jesus is in charge of my heart and theirs. I have a peace as they grow that some people just don’t understand… but my joy in their achievements is something everyone can relate to!

Type at you later,

~Nancy Tart

Thoughts on Sunday

Thoughts as Lucas is impressed by dozens of TVs, and talks about “His Baby” and “a real football girl,” and my young ladies are deep in conversation.

December 9, 2018

Thoughts on Sunday

Louis has this gas card that does reward points but you have to spend them at a specific restaurant.  Usually, this ends up being our “date night money” every two or three months.  This time, he said there was a special at one restaurant for kid’s meals and he had enough reward points to cover almost all of the meal.

Cool.  So we went out.  Party of eight.  This was the first time Becky (who, in her new “sweet” wedges she “found” for $4 at a resale shop, is the same height as Christina!) was not assumed to need a kid’s menu.

My teenagers (that’s a scary reality!) are sitting all dressed up at one side of the table with Jillian and Jaquline in their Sunday best across from them.  Louis and Kimberly sat across from me and Lucas was sandwiched between the wall, me, and Becky (wise waitress to give us the corner wall).  The three older girls have been working odd jobs to raise “Christmas money” (and saved “birthday money” so they can buy presents).  When they went shopping yesterday, they bought Christmas presents from several resale shops and a few small “scores” for themselves.  Kimberly was wearing her new pair of beautiful triangle clip-on earrings that complimented her stone cross necklace and her favorite dress and pumps (another “sweet find” from a clearance rack last year that she purposefully bought one size too big and can now fit).  She looked so like a young lady.  I love how my girls are growing into young ladies.  (It’s also a bit overwhelming to realize each of these three are sporting make-up, high heels, and share at least one adult size with me.)

Lucas couldn’t get over one thing… the restaurant had dozens on TV screens and five games going at the same time.  Lucas must have counted those TVs fifty times.  One fellow patron periodically would glance and smile at Lucas after he would gasp, “look, more football!  One-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eleven!”

“Mom!” Lucas exclaims as we walk to the bathroom, passing the other side of the restaurant and multiple other TVs, “more football!”  This amuses the few tables we are passing.  Lucas gasps, “a real football girl!”  (This is as he notices our server wearing a football jersey – she’s had it the whole time.)  One gentleman asks Lucas if he’s about to be a big brother.  “Oh yes, this is my baby I get to keep.” Lucas taps on my belly.  He asks if Lucas wants a brother or sister.  Lucas says very seriously, “I want this baby to grow big and come out.  This is my baby I get to keep.”

His baby.  Lucas is so excited about not having to leave “His Baby” at church.  Back to our seat and he’s counting TVs and football games all the way there…

Thanks for reading!

Type at you later…

~Nancy Tart

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