Butterflies swam in my heart, stomach, mind… anywhere… everywhere all at once.
I’m sitting in one of the folding seats in the Ocean Center with a baby nursing… I’ve been here, done that before, but never have I been in this venue for the event that is unfolding before me.
A cycle of pictures of young men and women in more childish images showed on the screen that usually displayed my gymnasts’ scores.
My gymnasts are sitting in the row behind me because our group of twelve takes almost two whole rows. They are not in warm-ups cheering teammates, but keeping siblings entertained as they all wait for Christina.
Marching Music!
There they come! Hundreds of young people in black gowns and caps. Christina has a decorated cap with a quote from The Hobbit. Her cap is bright green – and that makes her easy to pick out of the sea of black gowns and caps.
Christina is graduating with her 4-year-degree from Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University! Her graduation from high school with her AA degree from St Johns River State was the first college graduation ceremony I’d attended. I look around me at six of my other seven children and my niece. I smile; it definitely won’t be the last!
Everyone is waving and trying to get Christina to see them. Christina’s fiancé was also watching along with some of his family a little higher up in the arena! Kimberly is impressed with this use of the floor that she’s been competing on for three seasons and will be coming to again in 2024.
The keynote speaker starts: Rebeccah’s plane hasn’t yet landed. Louis is monitoring that. The keynote speaker’s last encouragement? “Adapt and overcome” – my Daddy said that all the time. It almost made me feel like he was watching.
A text. Rebeccah’s plane landed. She’s getting a taxi from the airport. It’s a couple of miles. She’d managed to get out of her college classes and work early so she could catch the earliest flight from Pensacola to Daytona. I had prayed she would get to the venue to see Christina walk.
I walked out to change Laud the same time as Louis said Rebeccah was here but not sure how to get in. I walked to meet her; she is very enterprising and self-reliant so had discovered the entry herself.
We took our seats.
Christina’s group of graduates stood. My crew waved and Christina looked up to see Rebeccah here.
We were all present.
Louis, me, Rebeccah, Kimberly, Jaquline, Jillian, Lucas, Theadora, Laud. Grandma Tina. Aunt Becca and Anastasia. Louis had his mom on video phone or something like that. She said she was watching it live-streamed. All of Louis’ and my little Tart clan was here to cheer on our Christina as she graduated.
Our determined, ambitious, perfectionist whose smile lights up rooms. October had been her 20th birthday. My mind flew backward to that box of confetti in plane shapes. She’d been accepted to the only university she wanted to attend: and Louis and I wondered how we would pay for it. Scholarships, grants, loans, and flight training on a few credit cards – she’d worked as much as possible to make it happen. We’d helped some. Christina had made it happen.
Christina walked up to get her diploma. With honors. (My perfectionist was bummed she didn’t make “with highest honors”) She did her little dance move she did at her “high school” graduation. She looked up and beamed at us. I am so proud of her! (And Thea yells “you got this!” – even though it wasn’t a gymnastics meet)
All of us were there. Sure, our baby won’t remember it. He actually slept through the keynote speaker and woke just before Christina walked. Thea and Lucas will remember playing and being bored, respectively. From Anastasia up to Rebeccah though; they know it’s a big deal. They know, with varying degrees of understanding, how much work Christina put into getting to this goal. They watched, with varying degrees of understanding, as she studied, worked, stressed, complained, forced herself to take fun breaks once in a blue moon, prayed, and pushed on.
With Little CousinMom, Graduate, GrandmaWith Littlest SisterOur Graduate!Sister-Cousins
We all celebrated with Christina.
I am so thankful for miraculous appearing of funding at needed times. I am so thankful for my determined young woman who made her goal happen. I will cherish this memory.
Soar high Christina! Remember what your determination and ambition made happen! God opens doors but you have to choose to walk through them! Your graduation didn’t happen “just because” – there were lots of late nights, missed sleep, forcing yourself to go to work when you wanted to sleep in, exams you stressed far too much over, budget cuts to pay for the next simulator, and other challenges you rose to and overcame.
Keep on flying high – you are “forever an eagle” now!
*Author Note* Wow, I didn’t realize I have not posted all summer! To say this summer has been busy is a severe understatement; this summer has been a crazy roller coaster jam-packed with life craziness. Hopefully, this happy little story of a new miracle will make you smile! *
August 7, 2023
The Miracle of Laud
There was a day Louis and I took off of work and decided to celebrate our anniversary. As I was reserving tickets for our gym’s Parent’s Night Out for my kiddos who weren’t working it, my boss laughed and said, something to the effect of “no more babies!” Louis wanted to try for a boy and I was not against it! (I love being pregnant!)
Almost two months later we took the last opportunity to let all the kiddos know in person (Becky was home from college). Our teenagers had various hilarious reactions we should have filmed (ranging from “ya’ll are crazy” to a slamming door to “are you kidding?”). Jillian was super excited. Lucas started cleaning a spot in his room for the baby; which Louis was convinced would be a boy since he used “Dr Jack’s method” that worked with Lucas. Thea asked a million questions and kept trying to hear the baby’s heartbeat and talk to the baby.
My babies like to hang around and I love being pregnant. This time around was so different. I was measuring large, but there are lots of factors that impact fundus measurement so it is more just a guide to make sure the baby doesn’t stop growing. I’m forty and my last pregnancy to term was four years prior. Even though, yes, I’m in what I consider really good shape, my body has been stretched out and back seven times. I actually wore maternity clothes a friend gave me this time like normal! I actually looked like I was pregnant from about 5 months on, a real first for me. I loved that!
We went to the team banquet, it was the first one Christina got to come to, and the girls teased me saying I didn’t have any formal clothes… I surprised them with what I considered the cutest maternity dress ever (gift from the same friend – they just hadn’t seen it yet). It felt so cool to show off the baby. Friends who had seen me pregnant before asked if I was sure on the date or if there were two in there. (Louis loved this, the baby inside was doing some movements that I still can’t explain, and secretly, I would have loved twins.)
My “official” date from LMP would have been August 28, 40 weeks from the baby’s start would have been September 4th. I just told people September or early October. I honestly thought early-to-mid-September because most of my babies were about 42 weeks old when they came; I usually carried closer to 10 months.
July 31st started braxton-hicks contractions, the baby was still sitting up high right under my ribs and had not yet “dropped”. That was spot on for me because braxton-hicks contractions usually come 4 to 6 weeks (even 8 weeks, in two instances) before the baby comes. My babies tend to drop 3 or 4 weeks before. The baby-mapping information, which is super cool to research if you have time and want to be amazed, was telling me the baby was up to one side. My milk usually starts leaking a week or so before the birth too and there was no sign of that yet,
We went to the beach in the late evening of August 2nd. It was beautiful! I always feel like praising God for everything when I watch the majesty of the ocean, hear the laughter and joy of my children enjoying the water, and slow down to consider how honored I am to be so blessed. The others did gymnastics drill competitions in the soft sand (handstand holds, perfect Ts, candlestick holds, etc.) while Becky and Thea made a sandcastle from dripping sand – absolutely breathtaking.
(beach shenanigans and laughter)
On the way home, it felt like the baby shifted to sit sideways. I mentioned that I would like the baby to drop soon so sitting in a car wasn’t so uncomfortable. Christina laughed. The sing-along music at the top of their lungs and windows open made it so no one else heard.
I woke up on August 3rd a little after midnight. I thought my body was doing Braxton-Hicks contractions; it had been off and on since July 31st. These stretch-and-prepare contractions came and went in tiny spurts and historically clusters of three to ten stretches that disappear after I move around, shower, or stretch was “normal” for my previous births. I remembered seeing a facebook post about one of my best friends getting home from the hospital with her son; she often didn’t have night nursing and I hadn’t meshed schedules with her in a very long time. I texted to see if she was awake and able to chat. God knew I needed to hear her voice and we chatted for a couple of hours. Just after 4:15am, what I thought was Braxton-Hicks contractions about midnight (I had showered and they went away completely), became an intense contraction that came in a wave. I paused talking to breathe through that one and mentioned that it was different. I said, “this is early,” or something to that effect and told Hannah I was going to wake Louis & call Misti. As I stood up – or tried to – another contraction came in which the baby shifted from sideways inside me to “in position” and dropped all in the same intense contraction! I’ve never felt that before!
I made it from by the couch to the just inside the bathroom (didn’t get to my bedroom to get Louis) and another seriously intense contraction came. Someone had left two of the deep soft towels laid out flat on the floor on top of the bath rug (a nice, soft place to pause where clean up would be easy). I heard Christina coming out of the barracks and she asked, “mom, are you dead?” I was in full relax through the contraction mode and answered “I’m fine” with a tiny voice she knew meant baby was coming. She woke Louis and went to get mom. Louis came in the bathroom and rubbed my back, “this is coming fast” my bones were doing the separate-thing they do at transition (feels like my spine is coming apart). With the next contraction, my water broke. I texted “my water just broke” and called. Misti ended up being on speakerphone with us the whole birth. I remember wanting to double check my “official” LMP due date that was in my phone memo with all the other baby measurements for this pregnancy (my phone appears to be my notebook for everything to keep me straight on facts– I sometimes call it “my memory” because I upgraded from a purse-calendar-planner to that). I couldn’t focus on anything but listening to my body because I didn’t want to move too fast; my brain kept trying to slow my body down – nope, body wasn’t listening.
One more contraction at total relax and the next one came with a burning urge to push. I felt the baby moving to crown and said something, likely incoherent at this point, about the baby crowning. I heard what I thought was Louis repeating what I thought I said. I heard Misti say something too, but I was focused on listening to my body and slowly (in my head it felt slow, but time is so relative when you are in concentration on something – it was likely fast) pictured what the muscles in my body were doing and focused on working with them instead of fighting against them. I remember praying and feeling God say, “listen” like a soft ocean breeze in my ear. He made my body to do exactly what it was doing now. I relaxed – rested – in my trust of Him.
Louis told me the baby crowned and to push, I didn’t feel a contraction but refused to panic, I waited and breathed deep to calm and listen; another contraction came and pushed our little one out. There was a cry followed by a choking sound. As I looked to see the baby in Louis’ hands, the baby’s fingers then arms and toes then legs started to turn from a bright pink-red to blue! The baby had come out with the umbilical cord wrapped and Louis unwrapped it.
Time here slowed for us. It felt like an eternity.
“What happened?” Misti seemed to be able to see everything though she was just on the phone, we said he was turning blue like he choked, she said to suction his mouth. I remembered that from Kimberly’s birth – her cord was really short and the midwife had stopped me from pushing to unwrap her cord, then used a long tube to suction out her mouth – she had been blue. I couldn’t see using a nose suction thingy, it was too short. I had heard Louis say he was a boy as he first cried. Now my mind said “he” instead of “baby”. “How do I do that?” I remember not panicking although the back of my mind was screaming at me “he’s blue! Not breathing! He’s going to die!” Misti said to hold his nose and suction him with my mouth. It was like she could see that I wasn’t pulling strong enough, I remember, “no, pull like you’re sucking a milkshake through a straw,” I prayed and sucked up a ton of mucus which I just spit on the floor. “Blow into him, firm but gentle,” I heard. I blew a breath as I prayed again. He shuddered and breathed in and cried out! I cried.
Christina had called 911 when he started turning blue. He’d been not breathing. It had really been less than a minute between choking sound and his next full cry. It had felt like ten minutes. It had felt like eternity. Everything had happened so fast but in my mind it had happened in slow motion.
Fire rescue came in. My mom said one guy heard the baby crying and whispered, “thank God,” as he entered. Misti told us to rub him so we had been rubbing on Laud all over to get the circulation back. We’d recently watched Thea’s “pongo dog” aka “101 Dalmations” and one of the kids mentioned, “just like the puppy.” I didn’t know which of the girls were awake just yet. I did suddenly realize when there were strangers in my house that I was naked and bloody and there was a giant mess in the bathroom – I made a mental note to throw out the towels on top of the rug and I didn’t care if they were the big nice ones or not. I had been focused on Baby Laud. Louis covered my shoulders with a big towel. The Fire Rescue guy looks at the cord, which was wrapped around my leg, the placenta hadn’t delivered yet, and Laud is at my chest height being rubbed. He said, “wow, that cord is long.” They waited a moment for the pulsing to stop so all the blood from the cord went into Laud. Cord was cut and they did some stuff checking out Laud. I told them, “we called for him, not me,” because “blue and not breathing is scary” and I told them what I needed to do for me (deliver placenta, get blood off to see if I am actively bleeding, etc). The guy agreed and said the baby was good asked if he’d urinated. Yes, with his first big cry after I suctioned him, he’d peed all over, which honestly had made us laugh. Since Louis and the rescue people had Laud, I washed to get most of the blood off and stimulate my body to contract again and get the placenta out. Misti was still on the phone and had all the times and such. Someone (likely Louis, Mom, and Christina) cleaned up the mess on the floor (I hoped the towels just got tossed).
One of the rescue guys said they couldn’t leave until they made sure baby and I were good – for me, that meant delivering the placenta and not actively bleeding. Placenta delivered along with huge blood clots. Louis goes, “I know what to look for.” He says the placenta is a fascinating organ and knows what the whole one looks like. The placenta was whole. I’ve seen them too, but usually I’m a little occupied with the baby and only once do I remember examining one because I was curious. No active bleeding. Sweet. Just that drainage, which honestly appeared too light to me.
All Laud’s vitals were good! His little fingers and toes were pink by the time the placenta delivered and I’d cleaned up a little so I felt ready for the baby. They checked my blood pressure, which was “a bit low” so I had to explain that my blood pressure is always low, stress makes it “normal.” They were so nice and it was amazing how quickly they arrived. Everything was good so we opted to stay home because I never sleep in hospitals anyway. Laud was perfect!
From the “my water just broke” text at 4:36 to when he was born at 4:43 was literally 7 minutes. I am still in complete awe of how quickly everything went. Rescue guys and lady left somewhere before 6am (that was when I texted someone, Misti or Hannah likely)
Our little Laud Arik “stole” Christina’s title of “lightest” at his new 6lbs 4oz. He tied Kimberly for the shortest at 19 inches. His name means “Praise” and “Lion of God” in Hebrew. The teenagers pointed out he is a Leo. He is such an amazing blessing! The girls of course, are vying for who gets to hold him. Lucas commented, “you have two brothers, he’s my only brother.” (Although that is literally true, it’s also a little funny that he decided that was why he should be able to hold him more than the girls.)
Our littlest love is here!
He’s ready to be loved on and spoiled by big sisters, his big brother (who has been his shadow since birth), family, and friends. We’re so awed and blessed and honored to have another little “arrow” to raise up! Thank you, Jesus for friends, family, quick rescue workers (even though he was all okay when they got here, it was provision in case he wasn’t – not breathing is scary to watch)! Thank you, Jesus, for Your perfect timing! Becky gets two & a half weeks with him before she’s gone until November, Christina gets a week & a half before her final senior semester craziness, I only missed the last two days of camp at gym and will be ready for driving with the start of school, my mom travels over summer and was here for just a four-day stay in between visits & got to be here… I have always teased that babies don’t read calendars… and my cumulative experiences with births keeps showing me every time is different and God has all of it in His hands!
Thank you, Jesus, for the miracle of love and life! Thank you, Jesus, for the miracle of Laud!
*Pictures because my girls say I can’t write about him without sharing pictures! (photo credit to Grandma Tina, Christina, Becky, and Kimberly because I was way too busy to think of pictures!)
Probably the first oneChristina, Laud, and TheaBecky and LaudChristina and Laud (she made him a “burrito”Grandma Tina and Laud (with a hat)He’s all dressed up!Mom and LaudHappy Big Brother (Lucas and Laud)Lucas and LaudJillian and LaudMy preemie clothes fit, Mrs. Hannah!Anastasia and Laud
Sister-Cousin Spring Camp & Making Memories! #2023 #Family #Sister #Cousin #Blessings #Connections #SistersAndCousins #TartSpringBreak2023 #SpringBreak2023 #Friends #WateringFriendships #PurposefullyBuildingRelationships #FamilyAndFriends
March 27, 2023
Sister-Cousin Spring Camp
The week of Spring Break for our county was also the Spring Break week for one of my nieces!
While I had an adjusted work schedule because rec classes were taking the week off, Spring Break Camp at WGVG was in full swing and my also-on-break-college driver wanted to make her own “cousin camp” with fun trips, crazy baking escapades, and lots of memories made!
The girls spent time making crafts, dropping in to Spring Camp to do fun stuff, took at least one beach trip, at least two “mushroom park” trips (aka Trout Creek Park, where there is a mushroom you can swing from), chased the escapee bunny that they let loose quite a few times, used the big floor blocks to make several castles and rooms, baked all kinds of egg-free Anastasia-safe goodies (I got to taste some), Christina and Jaquline made unique suppers and lunches, Christina went to a Celtic Festival,
I love that Christina is making these amazing memories with her sisters, brother, and cousin! She doesn’t have many limits on where they can go – and just like we’ve always done, everywhere is usually “free” (aka just the cost of gas). Christina filled her few days of break with loads of “taxiing mom and gymnasts” back and forth (competitive team didn’t take off spring break). She also got to drop all the siblings and cousin at gym one day to spend a perfect day with her best friend – who was also home from college!
When I was watching Katy, Buddy, Becca, Charley, Stacy, Dorothy, and Mary doing special outings and making memories with my oldest girls, I dreamed of my older girls continuing with their siblings, cousins, and friends. There were memories like “Monster Truck Show outing,” shopping with aunts, Alligator Farm trips, “Special Day” outings, long walks to the ice cream shop, beach days, park days, camping nights, firepits and roasting marshmallow visits, and other just “visit” days.
Now I see my not-so-littles being purposeful in their connections to their friends, younger siblings, and cousins – continuing to water those friendships. It makes me so happy! (A few pictures included to enjoy)
Random faces at the Mushroom Park
Hair SweepingSpider-Swing gone oopsLaughing!
Swinging Antics
KimmyJaqJillyAnastasiaLucas & Thea
These were their “look like yourself portraits” that crack me up! Christina perfectly captures each of their respective personalities in these funny pics!
Beach Trip…
…and they are always at the top of something or trying something daredevilish….
Each one is now looking forward to summer and the next trip(s) they get to do… even if it’s just friends and cousins over at the house playing with critters outside, swinging, reading, having a mega Frogger challenge, or the fifteenth Among Us game with every mobile device in the house, or the next life, monopoly, clue, or catan board game and resulting laughter! And food… my family does revolve most everything around cooking, eating, and cleaning up food (who really doesn’t?).
Dress-Up Meet and Impromptu Visit – Sometimes we need to reconnect and slow down! #2023 #Family #Friends #Friend #Blessings #Blessing #FriendshipIsAwesome #ILoveImpromptuVisits #GymnasticsMeet #WesleyChapelTrip #CharityChallenge2023 #GodsHandIsInEverything #SpecialVisit #IHaveTheSweetestSisters #TheaShowsOff #SistersAndCousins
March 24, 2023
Dress Up Meet And Impromptu Visit
My kids are a little strange (don’t we all think that at one point or another?). Sometimes, even my 19-year-old likes to dress up. Today’s story has my competitive gymnasts dressing up for their final meet before states!
The final meet before states was the Charity Cup Challenge. One of the longest drives, but the girls got to dress up in cute tutus and thought that was fun. Kimberly’s team of teenagers even started dancing in them – that was cute! Louis took Jillian down for Friday. I didn’t get to see their antics, but I can imagine from the pictures…
WGVG Silver Team at the 2023 Charity Challenge in Wesley Chapel, FL
Jillian came home saying the “entire place” smelled like fish nets. I couldn’t stop laughing at that!
Kimberly, Jillian, Thea, and I drove down in the wee hours of Sunday morning for Kimberly’s meet. Most of the time they slept and I listened to “My List to Joy” (a youtube mix I created ages ago).
We passed a sign that said “50 miles to this city” (where a sister lives now) early in the morning and I wondered if texting this early was a good idea. Nahhh… I’ll wait until normal nightowls have had coffee.
At the meet, Jillian found Ellie (another Silver Team member whose sister is also Platinum) and Thea got into the gym-sister encourager mode. Girls weren’t even doing anything but dressing up and Thea was like, “Marie’s got this!” and “Go Ellie!” (this made Jillian and a random team mom or grandma from another group laugh) Thea didn’t see how funny it was being a sideline cheerleader while the Platinum Team was wiggling around in their tutus.
WGVG Platinum TeamOur CharityWGVG Platinum TeamThe three travelersJust Kimmy and the mascot
We watched the girls do their amazing thing! Honestly, as my youngsters move up in skill and level, the competitions get more and more interesting to watch. Thea keeps going, “wow! I want to do that!” I had to grab this wanna-be-future-gymnast from hurting her neck as she was showing off on the awards floor trying to push up in her bridge again – she sang as she did: cartwheel, cartwheel, handstand, bridge! (but bridge arms were not straight!) It’s the mom clash between, I let my kids do stuff and I am not watching you break your neck, toddler! I pulled a protesting Thea into my lap with, “careful, your arms have to be straight first.” My just-4-going-on-teenager-attitude goes, “I know mom, I know,” with crossed arms. I heard quite a few chuckles from other random experienced moms on the benches behind me! Thea is definitely part of the entertainment wherever she goes.
On the ride home, we stopped to visit Aunt Becca and Anastasia!
I love visits when we can. It’s so easy to think things like: it would be bothering her, she’s not expecting a visit, maybe she’s not in, maybe they have plans… etc. Every one of those and many more popped into my head trying to prevent me from considering the visit – and we were literally passing by!
NO! Don’t think that way!
Text, call, or just drop by! It’s the human connection part of us that loves that!
(Yes, I did use my car’s voice-text to have almost an hour texting conversation with her letting my sister know we were coming – which was funny because my Platinum in the back seat was so engrossed in her texting with friends and totally ignoring my Silver in the front and our conversation that as we stopped she went, “wait, this isn’t a gas station, why are we stopping?”) And this is why in the wee hours when my moody teen snapped, “I don’t want you to come” to Jillian, I responded with, “well I do; she’ll talk with me instead of disappear into her phone.” I always try to stop and see family if we travel close to their home (close to me is like within an hour – more if we’re traveling far).
We chatted, Jillian ended up staying over with Anastasia (next day started Spring Break and Anastasia was coming to stay with us anyway), Kimberly, Becca, and I played a nice game of Upwords, we snacked on stuff (my sister being a chef, even her “thrown together” snacks taste amazing), and enjoyed each other’s company. I got to see the grand tour of the lovely oasis my sweet sister and niece call home. The girls played basketball – of course, as they are our children, it got competitive very quickly!
I love just being together! I love car trips because usually, the people trapped within play word games (i.e. I’m going on a trip, Famous People First-and-Last, Alphabet or Numbers game) or talk to each other. I love visits where we just “hang out” – nothing planned, nothing crazy, just board games or talking over food or watching the kids play. Becca said it was a “God-timed visit.” I love it when God lines everything up to fill our spirits with reminders of His provision. I needed the dollop of Becca time too – God knew it. We needed each other’s encouragement and smiles. The cool part was that I didn’t realize I was missing her so badly until we got to connect for those few hours, but God knew.
Sadly, a bad thunderstorm cell was coming our way and Louis warned us to “please not get stuck in that driving” so we said goodbye and Kimberly, Thea, and I headed home less one passenger. At least now, Kimberly was in a very chatty mode and we were able to talk about all kinds of stuff all the way home!
Go visit! Find or make a break in your schedule to pay a visit to someone you have been missing. There is so much work and schedule and life that sometimes we miss the part of our soul that whispers slow down and sometimes that close connection is just what we need to help us reset. It gives us a recharge to jump back into the craziness of life and makes a happy memory we cherish – and it can be so simple as a quick lunch, a brief hello, or even a phone call when visiting isn’t practical.
We love pumpkins. You cut off the bottom, scoop out everything inside and scrape all the yummy meat out (save it for roasted seeds and pumpkin pie!), decorate it with a silly face, and put a candle inside – now it’s an amazing nightlight that smells oh-so-good!
The first pumpkin I opened up with Grandma Jeanette; she was teaching me how to make her pumpkin pie. My Daddy had told us long ago that the reason for the perfect pale color in most commercial pumpkin pies was due to the company using a hard squash instead of pumpkin. Pumpkin cooks darker than winter squash. Grandma Jeanette used everything. I loved learning things from her because I can’t stand waste. She came from the generation and grew up using everything! Nothing was ever thrown away. I loved that.
Anyway, back to the pumpkin. She opened it from the top with a big knife. I was expecting puree like when you open a “pumpkin pack” tin can. Nope. Stringy spongy looking guts with spots of seeds reminded me of thick orange spiderwebs. Grandma Jeanette took all that stuff and scraped with her big metal spoon until the wall was very thin. Stringy stuff and tiny shavings that looked like slivers went into a big pot with a little bacon grease in the bottom. She had a really cool method of basically pulling on the strings and all the seeds practically fell onto a pan on the counter. She picked a few out. (I have never been able to duplicate that easy seed removal and wondered later if she picked a specific type of pumpkin!) Seeds got tossed around in an oil and spice mixture and roasted in the oven. The big chunks of hard pumpkin wall (not the actual skin, just the “wall” scrapings from inside) got chopped into smaller hunks and tossed in the pot with the strings and shavings. Water added to the pot. It was covered and cooked in a pressure cooker for however long we were sitting and chatting on the couch while the seeds roasted.
When the lid came off, the strings and hunks had blended into a watery orange soup. Grandma churned that around with her blender (it got handed down to me years later and had been manufactured in the 40s!) until it was smooth and now it looked like a darker cousin of the canned pumpkin I was so used to seeing.
Now that was pumpkin pack!
When Grandma Jeanette did it with me that year, she made all of it into pies for Thanksgiving and Christmas as family and friends always gathered at her house. She froze the ones to save for Christmas. I loved the heavenly smell! She taught me some tricks about the pastry dough. She sometimes short-cutted by buying premade dough, which she would prick with a fork, paint with butter and sprinkle with a bit of sugar on the edges to give it a “homemade” taste. For my scratch recipe, she showed me how to layer and roll so it would be flakey. Cold butter shaved into the mix. Don’t overmix. Don’t over roll. NEVER freeze your scratch pastry. Always bake the whole pie and then freeze – but it’s always best fresh. It’s super fast and easy to make anyway, so I LOVE making pastry dough from scratch.
This is why I am transported into happy memories when I see a pumpkin. I remember bumping around the kitchen with little Christina, Becky, and assorted cousins in and out of the house as we laughed and I listened to Grandma Jeanette’s stories.
When I cut a pumpkin, I make pumpkin pack, but I don’t bake 12 to 16 pies the same day. I use the canning pot and tools (all hand-me-downs from Grandma Jeannette, we still reuse some of her jars as well) to can the pumpkin pack for later pies. 1 pint makes one deep-dish pumpkin pie. 1 quart makes 2 deep dishes or 3 flat pies. I love the whole process! My plan each holiday season always includes a pumpkin and pumpkin pack and from-scratch pastry to make pumpkin pies. I tell the stories of Grandma Jeanette and Christina, Becky, and the cousins bringing critters (lizards, toads, etc) into the kitchen and being told how cool they were before being shooed “back where they belong” to “take them home to their families,” yes, that’s why I say that about insects and critters my children capture. I tell stories of our family because it feels so natural to do that while I’m canning. Grandma Jeanette taught me to can. She gave me our tiny library of books and pamphlets about canning, storing Florida produce, and food safety (old publications that came from St Johns County, University of Florida, and Ball, Inc with dates ranging from 1928 to 1965).
Louis carves the pumpkin shell with the girls. They love it! If you open from the bottom, you can replace the candle easier and you can sprinkle cinnamon on the top (while the pumpkin is upside down and let it sit to sink in) and it will stick and make the house smell so good!
Pumpkins make me think of family. Pumpkins make me smile because of the memories I have and the memories I hope I create for my family. What food makes you think of happy memories?
September 3, 2022 (Timewarp story from August 15, 2022)
Lucas was bouncing all over the house. “Mom! I repeated my oath!” “Mom! I went with Daddy to his meeting!” “Mom! I am part of Daddy’s meeting people now!” “I’m a cadet, look at my uniform!” “I get to go to the boom place with real cannons that blow up!”
And that was in the first three seconds after the door opened!
Anyone who knows Lucas knows that since he could talk he was excited about stuff. Anything he’s excited about, everyone else will know about within seconds. From “BIG TRUCKS” to dressing up in Daddy’s shoes to baby-surfing and everything in between; Lucas does everything with a full engagement and excitement that makes me smile.
Lucas became a cadet member of the SCV (Sons of Confederate Veterans) – Louis went on this discovery of our ancestors after getting Ancestry.com a couple years back and traced my father’s family back to Quakers in England who settled in Pennsylvania and refused on religious grounds to fight in any conflict until my Grandfather Pearson served the military as a baker and my Daddy joined the Air Force in the Vietnam War. Louis’ family, on the other hand, goes back to serious stakeholders in Florida culture and to Pvt. Gadiart W. Tart of Company D, 25th Division in the Florida military when it was under confederate leadership.
Lucas is super excited! Part of his “meetings with Dad” have been visiting battle sites, learning history, watching reenactments, and soon, (which Lucas is SUPER excited about) taking part in a reenactment – Lucas doesn’t know when, but “soon!” as he tells me. His idea of “taking part” is probably about the same as he and Landon “took part” in the last gymnastics meet they were both at: having a friendly hour-long wrestling match while their sister and cousins, respectively, competed. He does have a snappy uniform!
I’m looking forward to hearing all of the history he learns (even the girls remember the story of “the Flags of Florida” live presentation they saw at a family meeting where two ladies did a skit of two women following Florida’s return to the Union and they discussed each different flag that had flown over their land). I’m looking forward to the father-son excursions they will go on.
Meanwhile, he keeps coming in to our room to point out his paper that shows he’s a cadet member. (This sits right over Louis’ paper) So the usual comment is “see, I’m just like Dad!” and that, is what really makes me smile!
Our gym has an after-school program where our comfy vans pick up from several area schools and bring little athletes back to gym. They do gymnastics, crafts, eat snacks, and do homework. Thea and her other gym baby friend sometimes hang out there. Thea loves it and thinks she’s a big kid! Just like at home, she tries to do school with them!
Especially when someone wants to play teacher! Ellie loves to play teacher and Thea loves to “learn” and she likes the chalkboard.
At home, Thea knows not to eat coloring tools like pencils, crayons, markers, and even paints! At Aunt Becca’s she got introduced to big sidewalk chalk and tasted it. Sister-cousin Anastasia laughed and said, “eww, gross Baby Thea, you color with it like me!”
Once Thea saw that, it was like “aha! this is an outside coloring tool!”
Sitting with Becky one day, she pulls up a pencil and paper and says “yeah!” and starts babbling in her own way, giving us serious glances as she explains what her work is. Jillian said, “Thea thinks she’s doing school!”
Thea and Becky are quite alike. Becky understood before her first year that coloring tools were not to be eaten too. Baby Becky never ate Legos (except for the black squishy tires, she called them gum and we had to remove them temporarily – I think she still secretly stashes them somewhere and chews them). Baby Becky was my earliest potty trainer (at 14 months telling us when she had to go & by 18 months in regular underwear – I have no clue how!) and Thea is already potty training herself. She got super excited when I bought a baby potty for her tiny self – and knows exactly what it’s for (showed us by pulling at her diaper so we took it off & she used the potty, I teased Becky that she may lose the designation of youngest potty trained).
I love watching my little love get more independent. Each one of them unique and special. Each has different strengths and weaknesses. Each helps the other in various tasks to make us a cohesive team – we build on each others’ strengths.
This is how we all should be. Learning, assisting, encouraging; each doing what we do best and helping when and where we can. It isn’t just for siblings or families. This understanding of the learning and growing and maturing process is an important life skill.
And Thea is playing in the grass without eating it – amazing! She is totally a little Becky… until Uncle Buddy came along and taught 2-year-old Becky she could eat dollar weed (and then she wouldn’t quit eating them!).
Standing excitedly on the screened porch steps, 6 children stand about squirming, giggling, jumping, and otherwise trying to pitifully contain their excitement.
“What is it, Daddy!” chorus a half-dozen voices.
Daddy pulls out a stork – plain, white, six-foot-tall wooden stork.
“No, Daddy! It is a boy or a girl!” “Is it a Bobby or a Mary?” “Daddy! That doesn’t tell us anything!” “Daddy!”
He’s grinning under that “Indian Jones” hat he always wore. He loves the suspense. The oldest boy sits on the steps; he’s been telling us it’s a girl since he knew Mom was pregnant. He jumps when Daddy finally pulls out a bow – a pretty, humongous PINK bow.
The children scream with joy and start dancing about, following Daddy as he plants the stork in the yard and ties on that giant pink bow – announcing to everyone speeding up and down our county road that God had gifted this family with a new beautiful baby girl.
Our Mary.
Our treasure.
It was 24 days before my thirteenth birthday 23 years ago that I first heard my baby sister’s cry over the phone. (No skype or video phone back then.) Mom would bring our new baby sister home the following day all wrapped up in blankets against the South Carolina January cold. We loved, spoiled, and thanked God for our baby.
Our Mary.
Honestly I was an odd big sister; I read tons of parenting books and practiced techniques on Charley, Dorothy, and Mary, so they felt like my children instead of my siblings.
My Baby Sister.
Two days ago at work, just settling in, going happily about my day, I get a call from my Mom that made a part of my heart die. Mary was gone. She didn’t have details, but just that turned me numb. I went into split mode. Six months and ten days ago it was my Daddy; this was ripping my mother’s heart from her chest. Her baby girl was dead. My baby sister was dead. My niece and nephews would never see Mommy come home from work. My boss helped me gather my things and Thea and I started trying to call my rocks (phones are hands-free now so your voice and your car does everything, Daddy couldn’t call us from the road when she was born). I needed to talk. Louis told me he was with her babies. My Mom had gone to tell Becca in person. I cried, I screamed, mad at the waste – I didn’t even know nor care how she died yet. I was so irritated that God had let this happen to us. Mary was just getting on her feet again. She had found a home to rent, she had enrolled the kids in school, she was starting a real job on Monday… her life was moving in a positive direction.
She was 23.
23.
A baby. Her children needed Mommy. But she was gone. Talked with my baby brother. It was a car accident. An accident, a blink of an eye; everything about two families changes.
“Praise you in the Storm” came on Hope FM. Music is my life. God knows me. The next few songs playing while I made the 35 minute ride home seemed like God talking to me through them.
Mary had told me the day before that she kept seeing Daddy with his arms out to her like he was going to hug her. I told her that was God letting Daddy give her a hug while she slept. Now that popped into my head to make another river of tears before I got to the house.
I never understood having to walk into your own house, look your children in the eye, and tell them their Aunt is dead. Two of my daughters were closer to Mary than I was. She had been coming to stay with us for summers when they were young (my Daddy’s idea of “parenting classes”) until she married and divorced… I called her ex. (They’d been seperated off and on for the last three years but officially divorced on June 11, 2019.)
Death is horrid.
I don’t know how those without God can handle death. My hope is in Jesus and I know I will see those I love again. I know my baby sister is in heaven with my Daddy – her Daddy.
The roller coaster of emotions still races through every vein and artery in my body.
“You have to take care of her,” Daddy is saying – I’m 13 & she’s a bright-eyed 6 months. “Don’t let anything happen to her.”
But I can’t always be there! I can’t always stop bad things! I am so powerless a protector!
I walk in to Mom’s house (Mary was living there until she got her place) and there’s Mandy, Isaac, and JJ looking up at me all excited, “Yea! Aunt Alice!” and they grab sister-cousins and brother-cousin and disappear into the playroom (their bedroom).
Our focus is on these angels now. On helping their guardians (another sister & her husband have custody) as much as we can. On being there to tell them stories about their Mommy. On praying for them. On always being there for them through the life journeys they will take without her.
Oh, God, I know death was never in your plan! It hurts so bad. It rips our soul. I pray constantly that we will know peace. I pray that all those who lose loved ones find peace. I pray for my Mom – God, only you can comfort her. I pray for Mary’s babies. Wrap your arms around them and whisper to their ears that you are holding them and you will guide them.
Oh God, death is so hard to bear!
Go hug those you love, speak without anger, treasure the time you get with friends and family. Life is a vapor – you never know when it will end.
Not only did our little Thea officially turn two months old on Easter, but neither Louis nor I was working, neither of us was tired, and we had the whole weekend to ourselves!
Baby Thea dressed up (minus her cute socks and shoes) in her Easter dress from Aunt Becca & sister-cousin Anastasia!
Louis and the girls dyed eggs – our brown and pink eggs made some unique color experiments and tasty “angel eggs.” (Grandma Joanne started that; she redeemed the deviled eggs so they are “angel eggs” now.)
Louis was waking me up almost every night in the week before Easter as he excitedly told me about the newest item he got for the girls’ baskets – crazy plastic grass, cool candy, a bag of change for the plastic eggs and such.
We love family time! On Easter, we got up early, went to church, and talked all about the first Easter Sunday and Jaquline decided we had to watch a Jesus story movie – “The Greatest Story Ever Told” is the go-to for us. About lunchtime, we snacked on angel eggs and fruit while Louis crafted an amazing ham – this would be early dinner.
And… Egg hunt. The girls learned that Spring Egg Hunts were a result of people letting their hens and ducks out to range in the spring grass and then having to find their eggs for food – young children were tasked for this job and finding the eggs meant the end of winter harshness and the beginning of spring’s bounty.
But for us, Easter Egg Hunt means “see who can hide it best” (for the hiders, adults and teens) and “see who can find the hardest eggs” (for the younger ones). Kimberly decided she is still a youngling for Easter and joined the hunt as a hunter!
Becky took some pictures.
Christina’s hardest eggs were teal, Becky’s were green, and I hid the hard-boiled ones. Mine I wanted found quickly, so most were just rolled in the patches of clover so their stickers showed.
Down to four remaining eggs… One Teal, one Green, and two Boiled! Mom ended up winning with the “hardest” egg being inches from the walkway in plain sight!
Becky made up some adorable pictures with the baskets. Check this link to see her Guinea Pigs in the Easter Basket pictures!
Have you ever wondered if your kid was the only one who chose kitchen tools over toys?
March 4, 2019
Toys Versus Kitchen Tools
Have you ever thought it was just your kid?
…You know, when you have hundreds of dollars worth of toys for them to play with yet they would rather grab every plastic container, metal pot, and baking tin and beat it like a drum set with two plastic implements of some kind. (Spatula and cake server anyone?)
Nope.
It’s not just your kid.
Seriously, I promise. I’ve actually studied it.
In my very scientific study, conducted over almost two full decades, with dozens of children unknowingly participating, I have come to the conclusion that a mismatched set of plasticware, baking tins, and cooking pots serves as a more desirable toy than the newest Duplo set – to everyone under the age of five… maybe take that limit up to eight or nine if they are entertaining a younger cousin, sibling, or playmate.
Ready for some proof happening as I type?
…here is the playroom.
…and here is the front room (my kitchen and front room are divided by the couch Becky is sitting on – my photographer didn’t get the kitchen scene).
Do you see the children?
Just where are the children? Certainly NOT in the playroom with the actual toys.
So Becky is watching her algebra lecture videos while keeping an eye on Thea (in the bassinet), and Jillian, Mandy, Isaac, and JJ are bringing her “food” they “cooked” in the various kitchen tools. (The “food” is actually represented by alphabet refrigerator magnets – notice in the plastic containers.) Lucas, the other toddler in the house, is still “cooking” magnets in a cupcake tin just behind the bassinet.
In this one, my photographer thought he was going to play in the playroom, but no; JJ is taking three “hot wheels” back to the kitchen… he then served them to Becky while Mandy explained that they were “chicken nuggets.”
So, just to satisfy your curiosity: no, your kid isn’t the only one to spend hours playing with kitchen tools instead of his or her toys. Your kid is just being normal.
